Men who like older women need to recognize that older women know exactly what they want. Maybe that means a casual hookup or something more serious. But she will likely make it clear either way.
An older woman is strong, independent and totally self-sufficient. She doesn’t need anything from you, which is why she’ll often be pickier than she was when she was younger. There are certain qualities and traits she desires and values now. Others will make her run a mile in the opposite direction.
Forming a strong connection with an older woman is much easier if you know what she’s looking for. So we’ve outlined the top traits of men who like older women and how these traits make them attractive to mature women.
Characteristics of Men Who Like Older Women
If you’re wondering what older women are looking for in a man, it’s pretty simple. Some of these qualities apply to all women (regardless of age), while others are more specific to older women.
Here are the winning characteristics of men who like older women.
Have a fun and playful nature
One of the main reasons older women are drawn to younger men is because of their youth. Younger men tend to be more playful and fun. They don’t take life (or themselves) too seriously. This makes sense because they probably haven’t been through certain experiences yet that would make them cynical or jaded. Whereas men her own age tend to have been through a lot.
So make sure she sees the fun side of you often. Make sure you can make her laugh because every woman loves a man with a great sense of humor. Help her to look at the bright side of things when she’s feeling down.
This will help her to feel younger and brighter when she’s with you, and this feeling is addictive.
Men who like older women have to be open-minded
There are always opinions that will differ from your own, but are you open-minded enough to see that? Are you going to understand her opinion even if you don't happen to agree with it?
Always remember that men who like older women should always be honest enough to “agree to disagree” on certain matters. She will appreciate your honesty and forthrightness!
It’s also easy to tell if someone is simply agreeing with everything you say in an attempt to score points or avert any conflict from arising. And it’s boring if someone doesn’t have their own opinions.
So strike a healthy balance between voicing your own opinion and understanding hers when it differs from your own.
Successful men who like older women never “kiss and tell”
Older women value their privacy. They experience enough of the social stigma surrounding them wanting to date younger men (or even date in general). So they hate it when men simply see them as some sort of cougar conquest.
You might be younger than her, but she still expects a certain level of maturity and respect from you. That means you shouldn’t divulge all the details of your sex life to your friends or colleagues. Guys who do this only do so to appear more “manly” and “alpha” in front of their friends. Real men don’t kiss and tell. They don’t need to because they’re confident and secure enough within themselves not to need the ego boost of their mates patting them on the back after they’ve had sex.
Admitting when you are wrong is essential in men who like older women
We are all human and none of us are perfect. That means from time to time, we are going to mess up. We might say or do something out of frustration or anger that we don’t mean. We might make a poor choice that ends up hurting someone we care about.
What’s key here is that can hold your hands up when you’ve made a mistake and apologize.
Younger men who like older women should realize she is mature enough to give you a chance to explain and apologize before deciding to walk away. But if you don’t do this, then you’re not giving her the chance to forgive you. And you’re also showing that either you don’t care about her feelings or you believe you’re always right. Both of these are deal-breakers for her.
Admire her success
Be proud of how accomplished she is, and make sure you let her know that you are. After all, these accomplishments are one of the reasons younger men like older women. Men who like older women will know how much work it has taken for her to get where she is in her career. She will be proud of her accomplishments, and you should let her know that you admire her for all she has achieved in her life.
Your admiration and support will mean more to her than any awards or accolades she may achieve. They also go a long way in helping strengthen your relationship. Men who like older women know how important it is to be her biggest cheerleader. It’s not because she needs one, but it’s always nice to know someone is there by your side cheering you on.
Spend quality time together
You don't have to be joined at the hip, but it’s nice to do things you both enjoy. This may mean you will sometimes have to go places that you aren't all that interested in. But it may be something that she really likes. So be willing to compromise once in a while.
She will reciprocate by accompanying you to places or events that you like that may not be her cup of tea. But men who like older women will find the relationship can get much better if they don't object to heading into unfamiliar territory sometimes.
Fashion shows may not be where you see yourself, but if your lady wants to attend and would like you by her side then by all means go and make the best of it! When men who like older women are willing to participate in activities she likes. So try to keep an open mind and you might just end up having fun.
Experienced men who like older women know to give her space
The older woman you like had a whole life before she met you. She’s used to being independent and having her own time and space to do whatever she pleases. Just because you’ve walked into her life, it doesn’t mean she wants to devote all her free time to you. That’s not healthy for anyone. It also tends to be something younger women are prone to doing before they know any better.
If you pester her to spend more and more time with you, it also tells her that you don’t have a life outside of her. And that’s not attractive to her. An older woman will be more interested in a man who has his own passions, hobbies and friends. Older women are interested in younger men who can understand this.
So try and find a healthy balance of spending time together and apart.
Be financially secure
Know where your career is heading and make sure you know where your money is going because she is not going to support you! Men who like older women should know that she has a good grasp on her financial future. She knows how to plan and save and she knows where all her money is going.
An independent older woman relies on no one but herself for financial security. She didn't get this far in her career choice by being foolish with her finances. Men who like older women will find that she doesn't mind picking up the tab occasionally or is even willing to split the bill once in a while. But you are expected to do your share too.
Be strong but not overbearing
Men who like older women have to know how to be as strong as she is. But this doesn't mean they have to be stubborn, forceful or overbearing. If you try to be, you are going to find that your older woman can be a formidable opponent.
Be strong and supportive in a “you can lean on me” kind of way. No matter how successful or independent an older woman is, she still likes a strong shoulder to relax on once in a while. This is what you need in order to date an older woman.
They like the feeling that comes from having their older lady friend feel comfortable enough to lean on them.
Be adventurous
Don't be afraid to try new things, because your older lady sure isn't. So she is going to want you to come along on each new adventure. Don't stay stuck in your comfort zone because you have never tried anything before. This is one of the reasons older women like younger men--their need for adventure.
Men who like older women are going to find that these ladies are a lot more daring than they used to be. They participate in exciting activities, so why not go along with her and see what kind of fun you can have together? For many of the men who like older women, what she is capable of doing comes as a pleasant surprise.
Help around the house
Men who expect women to do all the chores like cooking and cleaning are a dying breed. And that old-fashioned belief just doesn’t sit well with most modern women today.
An older woman is probably successful in her career and therefore has a full-time job. That means she expects any man in her life to pull his weight around the house.
So show her you can step up and manage the house. Cook dinner without her asking you to. Make yourself useful around the house. It’s so much nicer when someone does something without being asked or nagged to! Remember, everything you do is helping her.
The most successful men who like older women are always honest
Always be honest: about your feelings, your ethics, your beliefs. Do not try to be someone you are not just because you think that is what she wants. Be yourself and upfront about what you believe in or how you feel about something.
Never, ever tell her what you think she wants to hear just to keep the peace. It's better to get unresolved issues out in the open right from the get-go. Men who like older women will learn rather quickly that she is able to spot a dishonest person a mile away.
When you first get acquainted is the time to let her know how you feel about certain matters--not after the relationship has gone on for a while.
Have integrity and don’t break her trust
She may tell you things in confidence once your relationship gets off the ground. That is exactly why you should never divulge anything she tells you to anyone else. Men who like older women may be privy to a lot of her thoughts and secrets once she feels comfortable with them--things that not even her closest friends may know.
If she talks to you about things like this, you should feel privileged that she trusts you enough to know her innermost thoughts. So don't blow it by being a blabbermouth! Trust is hard to earn and very easy to lose if you run around telling anyone what you know.
Be open to her views on marriage
When dating an older woman, it’s important to realize that she probably has set views when it comes to marriage. She may have previously been married and is now divorced or even widowed. This might mean she isn’t keen on the idea of getting married again or she might be completely open to it depending on the man she meets. Older women find it attractive when younger men are able to understand this.
She may never have been married because she never met Mr. Right, but she is still hoping for a fairytale wedding in the future.
These are all possibilities you need to be open to when dating an older woman. If you have concrete views on marriage yourself, then it’s important to have this chat early on to ensure you’re both on the same page. You don’t want to fall hard for each other, only to realize you both want very different lifestyles.
A simple way to broach the subject would be to say, “how do you feel about marriage?”
Older women are looking for different things
Older women look for certain qualities in a man that they may not have desired when they were younger. This is because our priorities change as we age, usually because of our life experiences and value system. Because of this, you can expect an entirely different experience when dating an older woman.
Some older women aren’t looking for anything more serious than a hookup, in which case it won’t matter too much if you tick all the above boxes. But if she’s looking for a long-term relationship, you can bet she’ll be looking for a strong, independent man who can be her friend, partner and lover.
When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. Here’s how it works.
