Most guys can agree that the opposite sex is oh-so alluring. At the same time, some men also find women to be somewhat elusive. Believe it or not, it’s possible to go after a lovely lady without making a fool of yourself. All you need is a game plan and a good attitude.
Are you wondering how to pursue a woman without coming off as needy? It’s easier than you may think.
Women are beautiful creatures. They have pretty faces, luscious curves, soft hair and gentle voices. All this femininity is enough to make a guy feel flustered. That being said, the chase doesn’t have to be so difficult. When you learn how to pursue a woman, you’ll have the confidence to get out there and make your move.
Whether you want to know how to your crush or what a modern courtship looks like, I’ve got your back. Here’s what to do and what not to do when wooing a woman.
Apps Dating Experts Recommend to Men
Whether it's your first real relationship or you have a string in your past there are a few apps that dating experts recommend consistently. These are apps where you can meet great girls who want something long-term as well as those just looking to keep it casual:
| Site | Our Experience | Our Rating | Free Trial Link |
|---|---|---|---|
Best For Relationships  | Experience Highlights
| 9 | Try eHarmony |
Best For Casual Fun  | Experience Highlights
| 9 | Try AFF For Free |
Great If You're Handsome  | Tinder Highlights
| 8 | Try Tinder |
How To Pursue A Woman: What To Do
If you’re new to the world of dating or romantic relationships, you might not know where to start. Here’s what you should do if you want to pursue someone romantically.
Get to know each other
For some guys, it’s hard to resist going after every woman who catches their eye. As soon as you find a woman you’re attracted to, you might feel like you want to be exclusive. For women, this can be flattering. And yet, the whole point of dating someone is to get to know one another.
It’s easy to forget the long-term reasons why you may want to pursue a woman. Ultimately, you want to find someone who’s a good fit for you. The first few encounters are all about getting to know each other and determining whether you’re a match.
Ask her questions about her life and get her opinion on topics that are important to you. Instead of waiting for your turn to talk, actually listen to what she has to say. Don’t take yourself too seriously, and make sure to flirt a little.
If you don’t come off as genuine, you won’t get very far. The idea is to exhibit your romantic interest while also showing her that you’re interested in her, the whole person. When a woman feels like a man is keen on actually getting to know her? She’ll be more obliged to accept his advances.
Enhance her life
As you get to know each other, you might both realize you’re interested in a relationship. So, now what? The best way to keep the flame alive while pursuing a woman is to enhance her life.
What are you doing for her or with her that enhances her life? You don’t have to buy a woman dinner every night or spend a fortune on gifts to enhance her life. You might offer emotional support, provide excellent conversation or make her laugh. Perhaps you provide her with fun plans on Friday nights or banter about her favorite Netflix shows. Maybe you’re the plus-one she needs to make all family events a little more bearable.
When you pursue a woman, she shouldn’t feel like she needs you––she should feel like you improve her day-to-day life. If she’s happiest when you’re around, you’re doing something right. You should both be great on your own but better together. That’s what being a power couple is all about.
Make her feel special
Women don’t want to feel like they’ve been selected at random. They want a man who can make them feel special, like they were chosen for a reason.
What sets this woman apart from the rest? Why did you pick her to pursue? Consider what you love about her personality, appearance and overall demeanor, and tell her all about it! Just make sure your compliments are sincere. Most women can detect generic flattery and one-liners from a mile away.
In addition to enhancing her day-to-day life, you should make her feel good by nourishing her self-confidence. People want to be around those who make them feel special. Tell her if she’s the best part of your day and you can’t wait to continue getting to know her. Expressing this is one of the best ways to woo a woman.
Be yourself
It might sound cheesy, but one of the most critical things to do when pursuing a woman is: be yourself. Like a lot of men, you might have an image in your head of what a “dateable” guy is. But forget all that!
Instead, just be yourself. Don’t hide your true interests or pretend you’re into things you’re not. Don’t act like an extrovert when you’re really an introvert or behave like a macho guy if that’s not you. Maybe you are a macho guy. In that case, do you!
The point is if you try to be someone you’re not, you won’t fool anyone. That being said, people in healthy relationships often exude their best qualities. There’s nothing wrong with this, and it doesn’t mean you’re not being true to yourself. It’s OK to step outside your comfort zone as long as you’re honest about your enjoyment factor.
Make sure your satisfaction isn’t strictly about impressing a woman. Trust me, she’ll respect you more if it’s not all about her. You want to enhance her life, but your life should be improved by the relationship, too.
But be your most confident self
In addition to being yourself, you’ve got to be your most confident self. It’s normal to feel nervous around someone you really like, but try to be self-assured. If you’ve got butterflies because you’re so sure this woman is for you, it’s not a bad thing.
Your confident attitude will be portrayed in person as well as over the phone and via text. When she sends you a text, send one back! Texting a woman back as soon as you get the chance doesn’t mean you’re needy.
Sometimes, it might take you two hours to respond to a text; other times, it might take you two seconds. Don’t play games here, and don’t be afraid to initiate contact. Did you reach out first the last few times? Who cares? Go with the flow, and don’t manipulate your texting schedule to come off as more aloof than you are.
If you try to play it too cool with a woman, she might think you’re either insecure or uninterested. Despite what you may have been told, playing hard to get is not the way to a woman’s heart. And it’s certainly not the way to pursue her.
How To Pursue A Woman: What To Avoid
So now you know the best ways to pursue a woman. Getting to know her, enhancing her life, making her feel special and being yourself. But before I sign off, let’s go over a couple things you should avoid.
Don’t hang out in the friend zone
It's true that I recommend getting to know a woman as you pursue her. But it’s also important to make sure you don’t get stuck in the friend zone. If you’re in the friend zone, you might find yourself seeing this woman primarily in group settings. Also, the time she agrees to see you might involve helping her move or giving her rides. Or even assisting her with home improvement projects.
You should be hanging out one-on-one, in romantic settings, and in many instances, at night. Of course, boyfriends help their girlfriends move and fix things around their homes. These favors don’t exclusively mean you’re in the friend zone.
Having said that, if you’re strictly helping her out and are never affectionate with one another, you’re not dating. However, as long as you do other things together, you’re in the clear.
The surefire way to ensure you’re not in the friend zone is to be clear about your feelings. While you might be afraid of rejection, you’ll never successfully pursue a woman if you don’t make your intentions evident.
Learn to take “No” for an answer
One of the most crucial things to keep in mind when pursuing women is to learn to take “No” for an answer. Hopeless romantics in movies get a lot of slack for aggressively pursuing their love interests. A little bit of chasing is OK. But if a woman is blatantly telling you she’s not interested, it’s your responsibility to back off.
At times, you might not get a clear “No.” Instead, the woman you’re pursuing may try to let you off gently by not responding to your calls or texts. In some cases, you might get short answers or excuses for why she can’t meet up.
People do get busy, and sometimes, things come up. However, if a woman wants to go out with you, she will make a point to try to reschedule. Without adequate effort to make a rain check, it’s up to you to take the hint.
How To Pursue A Woman Confidentially
At this point, you should have the gist down on how to pursue a woman. As long as you stay true to yourself and are receptive to her cues, you won’t come off as needy. You’ve got this!
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