Almost every guy wonders where to meet women for sex. Not everyone is lucky enough to have sexually adventurous ladies in their social circle. And even if you manage to end up in bed with a female friend, you risk losing your friendship forever.
Spoiler alert: essentially there are three dating apps we always recommend to men who are looking for either a date or something more casual. Here are our top picks across the board when it comes to finding your ideal match online:
| Site | Our Experience | Our Rating | Free Trial Link |
|---|---|---|---|
Best Hookup Site For MILFs  | Experience Highlights
| 9 | Try AFF For Free |
Best For Relationships  | Experience Highlights
| 9 | Try eHarmony |
2nd Best For Hookups  | Experience Highlights
| 8 | Try Passion |
The modern solution, of course, is using dating apps to find semi-anonymous sexual encounters. According to a recent study by the Pew Research Center, 53% of adults ages 18 to 29 say they have used online dating apps, compared with 37% of those ages 30 to 49. Smaller shares of those ages 50 to 64 (20%) and 65 and older (13%) say the same. That means there are plenty of options no matter which age bracket you’re looking for.
If you meet someone online for a one-night-stand on a dating app instead of those in your immediate social circles, you won’t necessarily have to see that person again if you don’t want to. This helps you to be more spontaneous without worrying about breaking someone’s heart.
If that seems like an impossible scenario given your social circle, no need to give up. It’s the 21st century and technology is here to help you spice up your sex life!
Methodology: How We Find and Rate the Best Places for Meeting Women Online for Sex
HeartInsider has a wealth of online dating site reviews. For every review we publish, our methodology to test how successful you can be on hookup and casual dating websites/apps is simple:
- First, our team of experts by signing up for a basic membership over the course of a week. Often, these are free memberships. During this period, we get a feel for the basic features and determine whether an app has legitimate users by sending messages (if possible).
- Next, our team evaluates the subscription memberships and paid features over the course of several weeks. We contact 50 unique users by message to engage in conversation. If it’s determined that these users are legitimate, we attempt to set up a date and exchange real contact information.
- During our entire evaluation, we test every feature and provide feedback on all pros and cons that we’ve observed.
Disclosure:
At HeartInsider, we prioritize transparency and honesty. Some of the links provided in our articles are affiliate links. This means that, at no additional cost to you, we may earn a small commission if you click through and make a purchase. Our affiliations do not influence our editorial content, as we only recommend products or services we believe will add value to our readers. Regular updates are conducted to ensure the information remains current and trustworthy. Your trust is essential to us, and we strive to provide the utmost clarity and integrity in all that we do.
Our team of dating experts has tested out 100+ different ways to meet women for sex online and these are the options that have worked best for us as well as the thousands of guys we work with.
The Best Places to Meet Women for Sex Online
If you think that finding women interested in one-night stand online is difficult, you’ve probably never tried the right websites! Today, dating apps are no longer exclusive to people who want a long-term relationship. Instead, there are many apps and websites primarily meant for hookups.
Here are our suggestions. We tested all of the websites on the list, so you can rest assured that they actually work!
#1 AFF is easily the best option to meet women for sex online that we've tried
Estimated User Base: 80 million users worldwide
AFF, (which has a great free trial) has been around for a while and it's easily the most popular and effective hookup option for most guys (especially if you don't look like a model (not to mention one of the safest hookup websites out there). It has more than 60 million active users, so you won’t have trouble finding someone who’s right for you. If we’d have to choose only one website for casual dating, we’d choose this one! Most guys are going to have the best results with it compared to the other options out there.
According to a study by Grand View Research, “The global online dating market was valued at USD 9.65 billion in 2022 and is projected to register a compound annual growth rate (CAGR) of 7.4% from 2023 to 2030.” This can only mean that AFF users will increase more and more each year!
Every year we test out and rank 100+ different dating and hookup sites. So far, AFF has been the best option for most men that we've come across. If you're really good looking Tinder is another good option but most guys don't fall into the top 10% of looks (naturally).
Just bear in mind that AFF’s userbase tends to have a little more men than women. According to Kalyn Sanders, a business development executive at Friend Finder Networks, “AdultFriendFinder snags the attention of over 55 million visits around the world per month, on average.” In addition, “Most traffic originates from the United States, followed by visitors from the United Kingdom and Canada.”
This is the website we’ve had the most success with, and that’s why it’s at the top of our list. We’ve also mentioned it in our guide about how to meet girls for one night stands, thanks to its huge pool of open-minded women that use it.
But you don’t have to take our word for it. Sign up for an account, and try AFF for free for yourself!
If you had to choose one app from this list it should be this one.
User Reviews for AFF
#2 Tinder works best for really good-looking guys
Estimated User Base: 107.2 million global traffic
Tinder is pretty much as popular as it gets with men and women in their 20's. This makes it a great place to meet women for sex online, especially if you are a good-looking guy. Guys who are great-looking can combine Tinder with some of our other favorite hookup locations to really crush it.
According to Heart Insider dating expert Ash Wright, "You can swipe all day and never get any matches if you put zero effort into your profile. Women on Tinder have their share of options. Unless you know how to stand out, you won’t get anywhere."
So be warned: if you're not in the top 10% of looks as a man there is a good chance you will struggle using it.
On this site, everyone’s looking for someone to meet for a sexual encounter and the messages move pretty quickly. Depending on where you live, Tinder may be more about dating than just sex. As with any site where guys go to find sex, you will come across a couple of users who lie online and have questionable motives. So my advice here is to try Tinder but be careful too.
User Reviews for Tinder
#3 ALT.com is great for those who are looking for BDSM
Estimated User Base: Over 1 million users
If you want to meet women for sex without strings attached, ALT.com is another great option. The website has roughly 2 million members, including couples and singles of all genders.
Most users on the website are into some form of fetish play or BDSM. Like on AFF, there’s a section dedicated to the users’ blogs, which is very useful to connect with other members and ask the other guys for advice.
The users are allowed to post their homemade erotic videos and to stream with their webcam, so you can have virtual sex with a sensual dominatrix before asking her out on a date. There are also group chat rooms dedicated to a particular fetish or geographical area.
The intuitive interface of the website makes it very easy to find women in your city. You can get a standard membership for free, so you can try the site without shelling out cash. The standard membership allows you to chat with other users, browse profiles and send messages. If you want extra features, you can buy a premium membership.
This is another website we had lots of success with. All members are very passionate about BDSM, which helps to create a sense of community on the website. While some users only want long-term master/slave relationships, most are fine with casual sex.
User Reviews for ALT.com
#4 Passion is a tasteful hookup website that's getting more popular
Estimated User Base: 67 million members in the United States alone (over 100 million worldwide)
Passion.com markets itself as an adult dating site with panache. Basically, it’s for those who want “sensual” sexual encounters rather than a quickie. You can tell this is the idea as soon as you open the page. Unlike some adult meetup sites, there are no x-rated photos or videos playing.
Passion prefers lustful language and playful imagery. There are many photos of women in lingerie rather than too-small g-strings or completely nude. If you live in an area where Passion.com is popular, your chances of meeting someone for sex are really good. Keep in mind that most of the site visitors come from the U.S., U.K. and Canada. But outside of these areas, the coverage is a little low.
However, if you're happy just to meet someone to chat with, you’re really in luck. Chat users are truly satisfied with this site.
Despite selling itself as the upmarket version of a hookup site, Passion.com is very easy and quick to use. You can sign up in less than 60 seconds. They also have a free trial so you can try them out without any commitment.
User Reviews for Passion.com
#5 Ashley Madison is for married people looking for affairs
Estimated User Base: 56 million members
We're not one to judge you for your life choices, especially if those choices seem to fill a need (or a kink). So if you're married and you want to find nontraditional dating arrangements, Ashley Madison is the app for you.
Discreet, quiet, and best of all, effective, Ashley Madison has evolved into the go-to app for married people who want more than the usual ball and chain. But don't get us wrong, this dating app also attracts its fair share of singles who want to indulge in hookups that are a little more taboo. I've seen people on the app who are actually single and just want to find no-strings-attached fun. It's not about ruining marriages for them; it's more of trying out something forbidden.
The best thing about this app is that it protects your anonymity. Even if you don't want to include a photo of yourself or a photo of your face, you can still find matches with people who are just as protective about their privacy as you. If you decide to pay for extra features, your credit card statement won't say Ashley Madison either. This is perfect if you want your Ashley Madison hookup experience to evade prying eyes.
To make the most out of Ashley Madison, check out our tips and tricks article!
User Reviews for Ashley Madison
#6 Pure is perfect if you want hookups FAST
Estimated User Base: Unknown, but that's a good thing
With most hookup apps, you're required to create a profile, fill up all the necessary information to attract other users, and then wait for someone who wants to hook up with you. While this is great, it can be nerve-wracking if you really want to protect your privacy. That's why the creators of Pure decided to do away with detailed profiles that other users can access when you're not on the app.
How Pure works is simple. You post a selfie and this is what other users nearby can see. If someone wants to hook up with you, they hit "yes". Likewise, if you want to hook up with someone, you also hit "yes" on their selfie. The catch? Your profile is up for just one hour. After that, it self-destructs and you need to create a new account to access the app again. I've used this app time and again, and that thrill of finding someone within an hour is one of the most exciting hookup app experiences I've ever had.
Another thing about Pure that I loved? Women get to sign up for free, and that practically ensures that there are more women looking for sex online than men!
User Reviews for Pure
#7 XMatch.com has a very naughty algorithm where you can meet women for sex
Estimated User Base: 7,000 Xmatch participants are online daily
XMatch.com obviously lines itself up as Match.com’s naughty little sister. You fill out a questionnaire and the algorithm cupid sends you matches. And with great functionality, this is a fair comparison. But unlike Match, XMatch is happy to link you up virtually and in person too.
The best thing about this site is how easy it is to use. And the security and privacy options are top-notch. There’s really very little chance anyone from work will stumble across your profile–unless they match with you.
But with all online sex meet up sites, it’s always best to play it as safe as possible. Online sites can be a great and efficient way to meet women for sex online. But the more time you put into making a connection, the better the results. So when you flirt with a woman online, try to check for signs that she's also into you sexually. Whether you test the waters online or in person, checking for these signs can help you make the next move.
User Reviews for XMatch.com
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Safety & Precautions for Meeting Women for Sex Online
Online dating certainly has its perks, but like anything in the digital realm, it comes with a side of caution. The ease of setting up a profile, sometimes with just a few swipes and taps, can also be a gateway for criminals to use fake or misleading personas to harm you.
While the online dating industry is catching on to enhance safety measures (such as AI-enahcned profile verification), completely eliminating all of the risks for online dating is all on you. There's only so much that technology can do to weed out the deceitful profiles amidst those genuinely seeking connections.
The following are some precautions you should take while engaging in online dating. For your safety, we’ve also included a couple of articles from HeartInsider.com that provide further guidance on online safety when using dating apps. Also, take a brief look at the most recent stats about online threats from the Pew Research Center.
Precautions for Online Dating:
Protect personal information
- Use a different name for your profile to maintain an element of privacy1.
- Create a new email solely for online dating to keep your dating endeavors separate from your everyday online activity.
- “We found that 63% of dating app insiders believe the risk of scams and fraud in online dating is increasing and that more than half admitted they could be doing more to protect their users from scammers and catfishing,” says Charly Lester, industry dating expert for RealMe. Thankfully, this is something that online dating creators take very seriously. “We asked executives and insiders to rank their top priority areas of 2021 and the number one priority was user safety and security. This ranked ahead of business growth, increased downloads, customer loyalty, and brand awareness,” Lester adds.
Be wary of suspicious profiles
- Avoid connecting with profiles that have no bio, no linked social media accounts, or have only posted one picture as these might be fake accounts.
Check out your match
- Cross-check your match's photos and do a background check if possible.
- Check out your potential date on social media to verify their identity.
Report suspicious activity
- According to Alex Niell, director of Which?, an independent UK-based survey company, “We've found most dating sites are quick to act on reports of fake profiles and scam attempts, so we encourage anyone who sees a fake profile or is approached by a suspected scammer to report it.”
Meet when you're ready
- Don't feel pressured to meet up in person until you're 100% comfortable4.
Guard your privacy
- Be cautious about sharing personal information and take steps to guard your privacy until you feel comfortable with the person you are connecting with.
Offline meeting precautions
- Take precautions when meeting offline for the first time, and consider special considerations for long-distance meetings.
If you want to share your own experiences with staying safe, leave a comment below. Heart Insider offers vast community of informed users and we pride ourselves on fostering better experiences when it comes to positive dating experiences.
HeartInsider.com Articles on Online Safety:
“Is Online Dating Safe?”
This article explores the risks associated with online dating and suggests that with proper precautions, online dating can be safe.
“The Top 5 Safe Dating Apps Experts Recommend in 2024”
Provides insights into choosing a safe dating app by looking at the number of users and the app's safety features.
Relevant Stats about the Dangers and Negative Experiences on Dating Apps/Sites
| Common Dangers on Online Dating Sites | Percentage | Description |
| Misrepresentation | 71% | People lying to make themselves more attractive |
| Fake Accounts | 50% | People setting up fake accounts to scam others |
| Unsolicited Explicit Content | 48% | Receiving unsolicited sexually explicit images or messages |
| Harassment or Bullying | 25% | People getting harassed or bullied |
| Privacy Violations | 18% | Incidents like identity theft and data breaches |
In addition, a gender-specific outlook revealed that women report negative interactions on dating platforms more frequently compared to men. This gender discrepancy extends to various experiences as highlighted below:
| Gender-Specific Experiences | % Women | % Men | Description |
| Unwanted Continued Contact | 48% | 27% | Individuals continued to contact them after being told they are not interested |
| Unsolicited Explicit Content | 46% | 26% | Individuals sent them sexually explicit messages or images without consent |
| Offensive Name-calling | 33% | 22% | Being called offensive names |
| Threats of Physical Harm | 11% | 6% | Individuals threatened them with physical harm |
[Source: Anderson, M., Vogels, E. A., & Turner, E. (2020, May 31). The virtues and downsides of online dating. Pew Research Center: Internet, Science & Tech.]
Meeting women in real life for sex is great and all. But you can expand you search by going online to find the best spots to meet women for sex online. So check out these sites and you could end up with a date for tonight!
Want to learn more about finding women for sex online? Heart Insider offers hundreds of relevant articles and in-depth guides that will enhance your success. Simply search our archives and find everything you need to get a competitive advantage in 2024 (and beyond!).
Frequently Asked Questions about Finding Online Sex
What are the most popular platforms for casual encounters?
According to a survey conducted by Pew Research, Tinder is the most popular, with 46% of online dating users having used it, followed by Match (31%) and Bumble (28%). Bear in mind that these numbers are based off a highly-specific questionnaire, with a considerable amount of niche apps and dating sites grouped under “Other”.
How do different platforms cater to different user intentions?
According to the latest stats from Online Dating Magazine and Forbes, there’s an estimated range of 2,500+ online dating services online in the U.S. alone and estimates say there are 8,000 competitors worldwide. Each platform has a niche audience in terms of target audience, relationship type, user experience, mobile apps and access, and much more.
According to Adelle Kelleher, certified dating and relationship coach and founder of Coaching Hearts Consulting explains that the userbase determines what you can expect on each dating platform. Kelleher mentions in an interview with Forbes, "While each app has its own [unique] algorithm, some apps prioritize specific niche qualities such as older singles, single parents and religion".
How do I create an attractive profile on dating platforms?
Creating an attractive profile has just as much nuance and strategizing that you’d find when meeting people face to face. HeartInsider has some great guides for creating an attractive dating profile, such as 25 Prompts for Writing a Great Online Dating Profile and How To Write An Online Dating Profile With Amazing Results (8 Key Tips).
Of course, there are multiple approaches to attracting attention online, but the most effective advice also comes from Adelle Kelleher (see above). On creating a standout profile, Kelleher advises, "When you describe yourself on a dating app, think about what makes you different and get specific... The more specific you are, the more you stand out from the endless swiping, as well as filter people who do not share your same interests".
How do dating platforms match users?
Kalley Hartman, a licensed marriage and family therapist, explains, “Generally, a user must fill out a profile with information such as their interests and age range... The app then uses algorithms to give users options of people to either select or reject. When two people choose each other, they match and are able to start a conversation”.
How can I start a conversation on dating apps?
If you’re looking to start a conversation on dating apps and don’t know where to start, our guide The Best Ways To Talk To Women Online And Get Their Attention has everything you need to know.
Experts such as Cynthia Shaw, a licensed clinical psychologist, suggests that online conversations should be just as proactive as those in person. Shaws says, "Let’s work towards presenting ourselves as respectful, assertive and curious to learn more about the person we are reaching out to”.
How do subscription costs and features compare across different platforms?
In general, you pay for what you get when it comes to online dating. Dating platforms are in the business of making money through various revenue streams, such as enhanced matching, direct messaging, video chat, and more.
While there are many great apps that offer free trials, most users will hit a brickwall when it comes to actually using the apps. Most apps offer free browning to get a feel for the app, but essential features like messaging and matching are limited until you purchase a subscription or tokens.
How often should I update my profile on these platforms?
Updating your profile on dating platforms is crucial to ensure that your information is current and to potentially increase your visibility and match rate on these platforms. Here are some expert and general guidelines on how often you should update your profile on dating platforms:
- Regular Updates: It's advisable to keep your dating profile fresh by updating it at least once a month, or ideally once a week. Some experts believe that dating apps reward users for keeping their profiles updated by possibly presenting their bios above others in search results or match suggestions. This practice is also good for scoring matches, as dating algorithms prefer fresh content.
- Update When Necessary: Update your profile as often as necessary without becoming obsessive about it. Major life-changing events and deal-breakers should be updated as soon as possible. Smaller details like hobbies should be updated when convenient. It's recommended to update profile pictures at least every two months or immediately if there's a significant change in appearance.
- Profile Picture Updates: Use a clear, well-lit, and recent photo that shows your face, avoiding selfies or group photos. It's crucial to choose a photo that reflects your personality and interests, and getting feedback from friends and family on your photos before you upload them is a good practice.
References:
Forbes Health. (n.d.). Best Dating Apps. Retrieved from
Grand View Research. (n.d.). Online Dating Market Size, Share & Trends Analysis Report. Retrieved on October 28. 2023.
Healthy Framework. (n.d.). How Often Should You Update Your Online Dating Profile? Retrieved on October 28. 2023.
Mashable. (n.d.). AdultFriendFinder review: A kinky hookup site for open-minded people. Retrieved on October 28. 2023.
Mark, T. (2021, July 15). Dating App Insiders Remain Highly Concerned About User Security, According to a Recent Survey. Forbes. Retrieved on October 28. 2023.
Ninja Online Dating. (n.d.). How Often Should You Update Your Dating Profile? Retrieved on October 28. 2023.
Pew Research Center. (2020, February 6). The Virtues and Downsides of Online Dating. Retrieved on October 28. 2023.
Pew Research Center. (2023, February 2). Key findings about online dating in the U.S. Retrieved on October 28. 2023.
Pew Research Center. (2023). Online Dating Topline. Retrieved on October 28. 2023.
Which? (n.d.). Fake and Suspicious Profiles Rife on Dating Sites. Retrieved on October 28. 2023.
Zwilling, M. (2013, March 1). How Many More Online Dating Sites Do We Need? Forbes. Retrieved on October 28. 2023.
Contributing Authors:
Tom Senkus
For more than two decades, Tom has dated extensively and studied behavioral psychology as a way of understanding the complexities of human nature until he became an expert. After traveling as a touring musician and living in more than 15 countries, Tom has cross-referenced his experience in seduction, dating, and interpersonal dynamics with the ever-changing landscape of 21st-century dating. His work as a writer has appeared in 500+ publications (digital and print). Tom is also the author of several books (available on Amazon). In his free time, you can find Tom recording music and cooking the best Cincinnati-style chili you’ve ever had.
Ash Wright
Ash Wright was once a World of Warcraft addict who hated leaving the house, a lot has changed since then. After watching the steady success of others, hitting the gym for some added self-confidence and forcing himself to get out there to trial things for himself, life has never been better. Having experienced the highs and lows of dating and self-improvement first hand, Ash has become a dating expert whose articles aim to give practical advice and examples that you can use along with your own journey.
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