You’ve been texting with a girl for a while, and things are going well. After establishing that you’re both single and getting to know each other better, things are becoming flirtatious. But when the time comes to move past the small talk and heat things up, what should you say? What are the best sex questions to ask a girl over text?
If a girl starts batting her digital eyelashes at you and dropping innuendos, it might be a good time to make a move. Friendly chit-chat is great and all, but if you’re like a lot of guys, you’re probably eager to get to the good stuff.
When it comes to sexting, saying the first thing that comes to mind isn’t always the best idea. Ultimately, if you’re looking to get laid, you’ll have to put some thought into crafting your texts. To get her in the mood, the key is to be smooth with your words, receptive to her responses, and never sleazy.
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There are a handful of sex questions to ask a girl over text that have a good chance of getting her hot and bothered. Of course, every girl is different, so it’s important to “read the room” before hitting send on any raunchy texts. With that said, I’ve compiled a list of 14 semi-foolproof sexy inquiries to help spark a naughty mood.
Sex Questions to Ask a Girl Over Text
The thing about sexting is that people are often much more comfortable with it than they would be with dirty talk over the phone or in person. When the person on the other end can’t see or hear you, it minimizes bashfulness. Also, when you ask a girl sex questions via text, she has time to think of the perfect response, which takes the pressure off.
Having said that, there’s something else you should keep in mind. Once you start shooting off these sex questions over text, it doesn’t mean you’re off the hook for regular conversations.
The idea is to show her you’re sexually attracted to her without coming off like a complete horndog. If you only send her racy texts from here on out, it’ll put a bad taste in her mouth, and your connection will likely fizzle out.
If you’re not sure how to meet girls, check out our detailed video series on consistently attracting women for guys who aren’t naturally amazing at it. It might help you get some numbers, which might eventually lead to sexting.
For a lot of women, sexting is a part of foreplay. In fact, the anticipation and buildup are sometimes more enjoyable than the sex itself. This might be hard to comprehend for some guys, but trust me on this one. What you say before getting it on is a critical component of sex.
It’s all about steadily building sexual tension and making her feel desired so that she eventually wants to jump your bones. If you haven’t already been flirting, I suggest starting there and working your way up to sexting. But if you’ve been testing the waters with flirty banter, go ahead and take it a step further.
Do you want to make a girl horny through text? If you’re not totally sure what to ask, I’ve got your back. Keep these 14 sex questions to ask a girl over text in your back pocket. When the time is right, send these risqué messages out like the confident guy you are.
1. The first sex question to ask a girl through text: What do you think you look the sexiest in?
This question is great to start things off slowly so that you can escalate later. In fact, you can text her this in the morning if she's the type who's a little more frisky in the morning.
Perhaps you kick off the conversation by sending her a photo of some bizarre, outrageous or seriously sexy women's clothing. This can suggest that you could imagine her wearing something similar.
Maybe this is an advertisement you stumbled across or a screenshot of whatever A-list superstar is dominating the headlines. A unique outfit with a touch of sex appeal is most likely to elicit the response you're looking for.
Often, she'll reply either agreeing or declaring that the outfit is positively hideous. Either way, you can transition into a conversation about what she would wear to look sexy for a special guy.
It's not just an excellent segue into more sexual talk, but it can also provide you with a lot of useful information about the woman you're interested in. It lets her talk about her sexy clothing and about what outfits she likes to wear to look hot.
After this question, ask her why those outfits make her feel sexy. Ask her how important it is to her to look sexy to herself and to guys that she's dating.
Don't forget to tease her a little bit on her answers to spike her emotions and spark strong attraction towards you. But most importantly, set up a date with her with the promise that she'll have to show you some of her best outfits later! That's a great way to have the date end up with you both having a little fun under the sheets.
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The more practice you get using these questions the easier it's going to be to pull them out of your head in the right moments. You don't want to be stuttering along or checking a list on your phone every five minutes!
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2. Have you ever watched another couple making out? What did you feel at that moment?
A simple way to arouse a woman over text is by bringing up previous encounters that were sexually charged. Ideally, you can talk about the occasions when she hooked up with you.
However, if the two of you haven't hooked up yet, there are ways around it. For example, you can talk about how it makes her feel when she sees other couples making out.
If she's talking about some film where there's a lot of romance or a party where a friend of hers hooked up, this question should fit into the conversation quite nicely.
This question is a bit sneaky because it will make her think about intimacy. That's because when most people watch others make out, they usually also become aroused. The obvious example of this would be when people watch pornography. It’s an extreme example, but people still feel similar feelings of intimacy when watching others kiss passionately. Although those feelings won't be nearly as strong.
Also, the follow-up question is far more important than the first. If you just ask her if she's ever watched someone make out, she could answer with a simple "Yes" or "No." That conversation would quickly be over then.
The point is to get her to think about that moment and get her to describe it. It'll often make her think about intimacy and possibly even sex. She'll start associating those feelings with you because you're the one who brought them up.
Finally, in case she's never watched anyone make out before, you can tease her about it playfully. Then ask her "What do you think you'd feel at that moment? Describe it to me." This could open up many doors for you. That’s because for women, imagination plays a huge role in sexual arousal.
3. Have you ever had a sexual encounter while in a public place?
When getting to know a romantic prospect over text, it's always fun to ask about each other’s wildest sexual adventures.
It's great to ask about public sex. That’s because she probably looks back on these encounters with excitement. That is, as long as she didn't get caught and arrested.
This question is a bit risky. But it's perfectly fine to ask if you've already led the conversation towards more sexual topics. By having her recall an exciting sexual experience from the past, it could help put her in the mindset for another encounter that gets her pulse racing.
What’s more, you get to find out whether she's naughty or not and see if she's sexually adventurous and open to such things. It'll also have the double effect of making her think if you'd be up for something like this while in public.
If she’s never had sex in a public place, you could always pivot to “Where’s the craziest place you’ve ever hooked up?” Who knows? Maybe she’s gotten it on in her roommate’s bed, a hot tub, or on top of a washing machine. In any case, you’ll get an idea of how wild she is.
But for the record, even if she’s never had sex in public, on the roof of a house, or on the kitchen floor, it doesn’t necessarily mean she’s a prude. She could be down with adventurous sex but just hasn’t had the opportunity yet.
You can follow up on this question by asking if there’s anywhere she’d particularly like to try a public romp. Her imagination will start going wild and she'll be full of anticipation.
It's one of those wonderful sex questions to ask a girl because it can easily turn your next date in your favor. If you engage women's sexual imaginations and their anticipation grows, you'll be much more likely to get laid. It's also a great opportunity to talk to her about her naughty side. You can then find ways to bring it out.
When discussing these types of experiences, the golden rule is to not be judgmental. If she senses that you're a prude or gets the slightest whiff of slut-shaming, you can forget about sharing any crazy sexual encounters with her.
4. You wake up tomorrow as a man. What dirty things do you do all day?
This is a creative and potentially hilarious question to turn the conversation sexual whenever she makes disparaging comments about men.
Maybe she's teasing you for being dirty-minded after you asked another question on this list. Perhaps she's making fun of men for being sweaty, hairy or always thinking about sex.
Whatever diss she comes up with, ask her how she'd spend 24 hours as a man. If she doesn't come up with a sexually charged answer, press her on the dirty things she'd do.
This is an awesome question that will stoke her sexual imagination. It’ll make her think about all the naughty things that men usually do. A lot of the time, it'll also get her to think about YOU and what she would do if she had your body for a day.
Make sure to tease her about her responses. Make it sound like she has a very dirty mind. If you do it right, this "innocent" question can lead to many great topics of conversation with her. It's rife with opportunities to get to know her naughty side, what she thinks about men, what turns her on, and more.
If she mentions hooking up with women, this can lead the conversation on to past bi-sexual experiences.
If she enjoys the question, prepare for her to throw it back at you. What would you do if you were in a woman's body for a day? Try to think of something more imaginative than "play with my tits all day," even if this is what we'd all do.
5. If you had X-ray vision, what part of a man's body would you look at first?
Here’s another sex question to ask a girl over text. It cuts straight to the chase and sets a very intimate undertone. Perfect if you want to low-key flirt with her over text but you want her to know that you're into her.
Of course, women may try to avoid it and play it off. She might say, "I'm going to look at your face" or something obviously non-sexual like that. Make sure to tease her about her answer. Then imply that she really has a dirty mind but is desperately trying to hide it.
Saying something like "Riiight, I'm sure you wouldn't notice the huge dangling thingy right in the middle. . ." will often do the trick and usually make her blush. A follow-up text saying, "Are you blushing right now?" will seal the deal.
Again, make sure to ask this question when you already know that she likes you and that you're both comfortable with talking about sexual topics.
6. Have you ever….?
Playing the “Have you ever” game is a simple yet effective tactic to get to know someone’s sexual personality. It’s fun, sexy, flirtatious and very informative.
Aside from asking a girl if she’s ever had sex in public, you might try texting her these questions:
- Have you ever had a threesome? If not, would you ever?
- Have you ever hooked up with a girl? If not, would you?
- Have you ever had sex in a pool? How about a shower? A car?
- Have you ever fantasized about someone or something you’re not supposed to?
- Have you ever had sex more than twice in the same day?
- Have you ever used a sex toy with a partner?
I don’t recommend rapid-firing all these questions at once. Ask her one at a time, see how she answers, and build off her response.
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7. Why are you making me think of all these thoughts about you?
This is another awesome question that can build anticipation before the date. It also gets a reply almost every single time because women will want to know what type of thoughts you're thinking about them.
Plus, it creates a lot of sexual tension because you're basically shifting the blame of escalation on her. It’s like you're accusing her of being so damn hot that you can't help but think all these naughty thoughts about her. Thus shifting the blame and making it seem like she’s doing this to you on purpose.
When she inevitably asks you what those thoughts are, don't be crass. But make sure to explain them as erotically as possible. It's a fantastic opportunity to bring up how you were feeling the last time the two of you were together.
If you hooked up, detail the hottest moments and how they made you feel. If you're yet to get physical, you can talk about the naughty thoughts that her appearance (or her pictures) are making you feel. Women love the idea of turning men on against their will. It makes them feel naughty and powerful.
When you're texting, it gives you the time and space to go into tantalizing detail. Think of how an erotic romance novel would describe something like this. There's a reason “50 Shades of Grey” has sold billions of copies.
8. What’s your favorite part of a man’s body?
This is another one of those sex questions to ask a girl that naturally prompts dirty talk.
That's because all women have a favorite part of the male body. Some women even appreciate a nice dad-bod!
Once she names a body part, you can make assumptions about what she enjoys about it.
So, if she says arms, you can tell she likes pinned down by a strong man. If she says abs or butt, you can talk about her running her hands over this body part during a first kiss. Even with an innocent answer like a man’s eyes or smile, you can talk about staring at each other while lying in bed.
The question is: what if you're severely lacking in the body part she mentions? The best option is usually to make fun of yourself. This shows you don't have any insecurities about your body. This is usually more important to a woman than any superficial aspect of a man's body.
Once you start talking to the woman you like regarding what she enjoys about a man's anatomy, it’s always fun to playfully tease her on her answers. Then, ask her "What’s the sexiest part of your body?" and talk about that. Whether she answers without hesitation, tell her you appreciate self-confidence in a woman. If she tells you she doesn't know, assure her that self-confidence is incredibly sexy. This should prompt her to go into more detail about her body.
Next, it's all about making innocent-sounding comments, sexual innuendos and moving the topic into increasingly sexual territory. If you do it right, this topic nearly always ends up with both of you texting about what's between a man's legs and how much women enjoy that part of the male anatomy.
On the other hand, if she answers with a generally unsexy body part, like a man’s thumb or elbow, take the hint. She might not be into dirty talk, so take a step back and try again another time.
9. The ultimate sex question to ask a girl through text: What are you wearing right now?
Ahh, the old classic.
Asking her what she's wearing can lead the conversation into exciting territory. Who knows, she might be wearing absolutely nothing if she's getting ready to shower or head to bed.
In any event, this tried and true question opens the door to lots of flirting and sexy banter. Even though it’s a bit overused, it’s still one of the greats. I’d guess that there are probably no sex questions to ask a girl that have been used by people more often than this one. And there’s a really good reason why--it simply works!
More often than not, this question can lead to a woman sexting or sending dirty pictures. If she doesn't send one initially, you can prompt her for pictures.
Along the same line, another one of the best sex questions to ask a girl over text is “Do you ever sleep naked?” Maybe she sleeps naked often, just once in a while, or only after sex. Or perhaps she’ll tell you she sleeps in a t-shirt and panties. Think of her answer as a sneak preview of sleeping with her.
10. Would you rather give me a massage or get one from me?
This is a playful sex question to ask a girl through text that builds anticipation for your date and can often lead to sex.
It's also the perfect question to turn around boring and negative topics about how stressed and overworked she is.
For whatever reason, women love to complain about this to potential romantic partners. When this happens, they're not looking for a solution. They mostly want to feel heard and have their bad mood shifted upside-down.
Tell her it sounds like she needs a relaxing massage. Then, ask whether she prefers to give or receive. This question should be cheeky enough to lift her out of her bad mood.
More often than not, she'll answer that she'd rather get one. But that's where you turn it around and say something like "Sure! But only if you ask me very nicely later tonight . . ." or "If you bribe me enough . . ."
Talk about massages in general. Describe them in a really appealing way and how much you enjoy them so that she starts wanting one. If you make the idea of a massage sound really appealing to her, she'll definitely want to receive one later. That can lead to a very intimate evening.
Once again, it's advantageous to paint a vivid picture with your words. If you can have her imagining exactly what a massage from you would be like, it'll be that much harder to resist.
11. Netflix and Chill? I have wine . . .
The "Netflix and Chill" catchphrase has become so overused and plagued with seedy connotations that it has become a turn-off for a lot of women.
Still, if you make this sort of proposal without the cheesy slogan, this is the sort of sex question to ask a woman through text that will get you laid the fastest. In fact, it's one thing you can text her after hooking up with her.
It makes your intentions loud and clear. Provided you've been at least a little flirtatious in your previous exchanges, few women are naive enough to believe you just want to watch “House of Cards.”
She'll either be up for it, or she'll think it's not the time for that yet. Either way, she’ll still see that you're interested in her sexually. If she then goes on a date with you after that, it means some "Netflix and Chill" is definitely on the menu later. That is, if you play your cards right.
12. What’s your favorite position?
Some girls are shy about sharing their favorite position. However, if things have already been heating up, this is one of the sex questions to ask a girl over text that’ll take it to the next level.
Maybe she likes to be on top or is partial to 69. She might be into doggy style or something you’ve never even heard of. Does she like to be in control, more submissive or a little of both? Her answer will give you an idea of what she likes in bed, which should make the sex better right off the bat.
13. Do you like to touch yourself?
Basically everyone masturbates—it’s just a fact of life. While you can pretty much assume the girl you’re texting touches herself from time to time, her answer will be telling. If she says no, don’t sweat it. But if she says yes, see where the conversation takes you.
You might ask her what she thinks about when she plays with herself. Does she have any go-to fantasies? What’s something that gets her wet every time? Does she use a vibrator? Similar to asking her about her favorite position, these questions will give you some clues about how to please her when you have a face-to-face rendezvous.
14. The obvious sex question to ask a girl over text: Do you watch porn?
Much like masturbating, most people watch porn—yes, even women. If you’re going to be regularly hooking up, this is one of the most useful sex questions to ask a girl over text.
When you ask her if she watches porn, she could certainly say no, which may or may not be true. Some people are really shy and even ashamed about watching porn, so don’t overthink it if she doesn’t want to talk about it.
That being said, if she says yes, it’ll open up the conversation for some exciting dirty talk. If she does watch porn, what kind is she into, and what does she like about it? Maybe she’d be into watching porn together sometime.
Keep in mind that the type of porn people watch doesn’t always equate to what they’d be willing to do in real life. For example, she might like watching videos of orgies, but this doesn’t necessarily mean she’s had one or would ever have one.
Sex Questions to Ask a Girl Over Text: Final Thoughts
Successfully turning a girl on via text without scaring her away or coming off as creepy is a fine line to walk. But the thing is, a girl is never going to have sex with you if she can’t picture having sex with you. If you’re thinking “Huh?!”, let me explain. Sexting is all about creating the right mental images.
All these dirty questions will get both of you imagining what hooking up with each other would be like. As she answers your inquiries, be sure to provide her with just as much information about yourself. This will give her an idea of your style in bed.
Plus, women don’t like it when guys make them do all the work—even when it comes to dirty talk. If she’s answering all your questions and you’re not giving anything back, she might just think you’re using her for material to get yourself off.
Remember, engaging a woman’s sexual imagination through text is all about timing and creativity. If you want to ask girls sex questions over text, mornings or afternoons are a horrible time to do so. Most people are busy at that time with work, school or other errands. Don't instantly assume she's not responding to you if you send her a text at the busiest time of her day.
The best time to text would be in the early evening. Early evenings are almost always a good time to text the woman you like. She’ll be off work and done with all her errands, working out and dinner. Now she’ll be settling down and ready to completely unwind.
At this point, she’s comfortable and she feels good. She is in the perfect mood for some text flirtation with you. If you engage her sexual imagination now, she may even go to bed later thinking of you. Imagine how well your future date can go if she has a wet dream about you.
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