Dating is already challenging when you're navigating monogamous relationships. But when you embrace a polyamorous lifestyle, the entire game changes. Although monogamy remains the norm, polyamorous relationships are increasingly prevalent, with at least 1 in 6 people exploring these types of connections. Unfortunately, finding poly partners on mainstream dating apps can often be frustratingly futile.
This is where specialized platforms come into play. Free polyamory dating apps and the best dating sites for open relationships are designed to make these unique romantic connections easier. If you're exploring your options and looking for reliable polyamory dating sites for free, this guide is tailored for you. Let’s delve into the top polyamorous dating sites and their essential features to help you find love.
Top options if these free polyamory dating apps don’t work out
Whether you’re new to the world of polyamory or you’re just getting started, it can be intimidating to dive head first into this new lifestyle. It’s especially difficult if you’re already having a tough time finding one partner, let alone multiple. To help you get started, here are some of the top dating sites where you can find someone who’s looking for the same thing you are:
Site Our Experience Our Rating Free Trial Link 
Experience Highlights Try eHarmony 
Experience Highlights Try AFF For Free 
Tinder Highlights Try Tinder
Methodology: Checking Out the Best Polyamory Dating Sites
When we went hunting for the top polyamory dating sites, we kept things pretty chill and laid-back, using a method that covered all the bases. Here's what we did:
Checking Out the Crowd: We scoped out how many cool folks were hanging out on each site, looking for a good mix of different types of people from all over. More variety usually means more chances of finding someone who vibes with you.
Features That Make Life Easier: We took a good look at what each site had to offer in terms of features. Stuff like being able to customize your profile, filter searches to find what you're into, and having smooth ways to chat with potential matches were big pluses.
Being Cool and Inclusive: We made sure the sites were all about accepting everyone for who they are, especially if they're into non-monogamous relationships like polyamory. It's all about that love and acceptance vibe!
Staying Safe and Secure: Safety first, always! We wanted to see sites that take their users' safety seriously, with things like verifying profiles, keeping personal info safe, and having tools to deal with any sketchy behavior.
Bang for Your Buck: We weighed up the cost of joining each site against what you get for your money. Some offer free basic stuff with extras you can pay for, while others might have a subscription thing going on. We wanted to see if it was worth it for polyamorous peeps.
Word on the Street: Finally, we checked out what people were saying about each site. User feedback is gold! We looked at forums, social media, and reviews to see if folks were loving the experience or not.
With this laid-back approach, we aimed to give you the lowdown on the best polyamory dating sites out there, so you can find your perfect match without any stress.
What are the Best Poly Dating Sites in 2024?
First, let’s differentiate polyamory and polygamy. Dr. Heath Schechinger, a counseling psychologist at the University of California, Berkeley, provides an insightful explanation of the differences between polyamory and polygamy.
He states, "Polyamory is the state, practice, or orientation of having multiple sexual and/or romantic relationships simultaneously, with the full knowledge and consent of everyone involved," contrasting it with polygamy, which involves being married to multiple spouses at the same time. This quote emphasizes the consent and awareness required in polyamorous relationships compared to the marriage-focused and often religiously structured nature of polygamy.
The best poly dating site can vary depending on your personal preferences. However, here are a couple of good sites out there that can help you get started:
- Feeld
- AFF
- #Open
- Down
- OkCupid
- Ashley Madison
- MoreThanOne
Top Best Polyamorous Dating Sites Listed and Rated
Now that you pretty much have an idea of what a polyamorous relationship is and how it works let’s get the ball rolling and go over the top polyamorous dating sites out there!
Generally, using the usual dating apps like Tinder and Bumble won’t work. That’s because these are designed for people looking for casual hookups or monogamous relationships, not polyamorous relationships.
To help you find suitable sites, here are a couple of the top polyamorous dating sites that will connect you with a new romantic interest.
Feeld
Feeld stands out as one of the best dating sites for open relationships, appreciated for its commitment to creating a space where diverse romantic connections are not just possible but encouraged. One of the key aspects that makes Feeld a preferred choice for those exploring polyamory is its inclusive approach, which is well-aligned with the broader values of polyamorous communities.
Amy Gahran, a respected voice in discussions about non-traditional relationships, touches on a core principle that resonates with Feeld’s ethos: "Polyamory isn’t about having more partners; it’s about creating and sustaining meaningful relationships." This quote emphasizes the importance of honesty and depth in relationships, which is foundational to Feeld's platform. This perspective is particularly relevant as it highlights the aim of polyamory to foster connections that are based on trust and understanding, rather than merely expanding the number of romantic links.
Feeld, being recognized among the top free polyamory dating apps, offers a practical tool for those who are looking to explore polyamory without the pressure of traditional dating norms. It provides a platform where individuals can discover and engage with others who share their interest in honest, open, and meaningful polyamorous relationships.
Feeld comes with a free and a premium version. Naturally, the app offers more functionalities with the premium version at a price. The majestic (premium) version costs $14.99 for 30 days and $22.99 for 90 days. Check out our Feeld review for more info.
Features:
- More than 20 sexuality and gender identity choices
- The ability to upload as many as six pictures of your choice
- List down your interests and desires
- A group chat feature where you can introduce yourself to a large group and get to know one another
- A built-in messaging app that allows you to message a person you’ve matched with
- Private photos visible only to your connections
- Incognito mode
What people think of Feeld:
Hungry4Nudel - Reddit
Personally I like it more than the other apps because monogamy tends to be the exception rather than the rule on Feeld, but aside from that it's not like the experience is going to be markedly different than any other online dating platform.
AFF
Adult FriendFinder (AFF) stands out as one of the best dating sites for open relationships, particularly known for facilitating straightforward hookups with multiple people. Although AFF is not free, its effectiveness in the polyamorous dating scene often justifies the cost, especially for those looking for less conventional relationship dynamics. This platform is well-regarded not just for casual encounters but also for fostering a more adventurous approach to dating and relationships.
Dr. Deborah Taj Anapol, an expert in polyamory, provides insights into the values that underpin sites like AFF: "Polyamory isn’t a solution for a floundering relationship, but it can solve problems of unequal or different sexual desire in an otherwise healthy and happy relationship." This quote underscores the potential of platforms like AFF to facilitate honest and open connections among those who are exploring polyamory, emphasizing the importance of clear communication and emotional literacy in such dynamics.
While AFF may not be categorized under free polyamory dating apps, its reputation as a leading site for those interested in polyamory and other non-monogamous relationships remains strong. The platform offers a robust environment where users can explore their desires transparently and respectfully, which is crucial for maintaining healthy polyamorous relationships.
To give you a more detailed look at how AFF works and how it performs for regular guys, you can also have a look at our Adult FriendFinder review.
Features:
- Open to all genders, kinks, preferences, etc.
- Easy to use
- There's an AFF free trial
- Discreet--you don't need to post a photo of your face to find matches
- Millions of users worldwide
What people think of AFF:
Mamajamerson - Reddit
Allow me to echo what others are saying here. If you choose to go the route of dating sites, be prepared to be ignored or even actively rejected on a regular basis. People will often become enraged at the mere mention of "a couple seeking a female to join".
In the past, I've found much greater success using AFF, or visiting local swing clubs. I have never found the courage to approach someone IRL without first being aware they were into it, so I have nothing to offer on that front.
Have you tried using AFF for engaging in polyamorous relationships? Let us know how it went in the comments below!
#Open
If you’re looking to use polyamory dating sites for free, #Open stands out particularly due to its commitment to fostering an inclusive environment for exploring non-monogamous relationships. The platform's unique use of hashtags helps users express their preferences and find compatible matches, facilitating openness and honest communication which is essential in polyamory.
An expert on polyamorous relationships, Dr. Elisabeth Sheff, explains the challenges and opportunities within non-monogamous dynamics: "Non-monogamy can create new attachment ruptures, but also new opportunities for attachment healing. The community aspect of non-monogamy can provide significant support and growth opportunities for individuals." This quote underscores the potential emotional depth and community support that platforms like #Open aim to provide, allowing individuals to explore relationships that defy traditional norms (#open)
#Open also comes with a free and paid version. For $9.99 monthly, you can enjoy additional features.
Features:
- Use hashtags of #yes, #no, and #maybe to let the app determine your preferences.
- A secure partner account so you can chat together
- Easy toggling between partner and solo profiles
- View the people who like you first (paid)
- 15 sparks monthly you can send to the individuals you want to hang out with (paid)
- View multiple likes through the power grid access (paid)
What people think of #Open:
Lipslut - Reddit
My only problem with it is that it will only narrow down location to a 50 mile radius. That’s about how far I am from a major city that isn’t easy enough to get to go regularly date someone there. So most everyone I see on there is 45+ miles away.
Down
Down, one of the free polyamory dating apps, caters to those looking to explore non-monogamous relationships in a casual setting. It's recognized for its straightforward approach to connecting individuals who are clear about their desires for open and ethically non-monogamous encounters.
Elisabeth Sheff again offers insights that are pertinent to users of apps like Down. She discusses how hierarchical polyamorous relationships can offer high levels of satisfaction and emotional support when everyone involved agrees on the structure. She explains, "people are happiest in hierarchical polyamorous and other couple-focused relationships when all participants are fully agreed on the type of structure, and the people who are secondaries to each other prefer that type of relationship," highlighting the importance of clear agreements and mutual satisfaction in such arrangements.
Down facilitates a platform where individuals can openly communicate their relationship structures and expectations, aligning with Dr. Sheff’s emphasis on the necessity of agreement and satisfaction in polyamorous dynamics.
Down’s paid version, or VIP version, costs $19.99. For more details on this app, check out our Down dating app review.
Features:
- A photo verification to guarantee no fake profiles exist
- Snap Match: chat matchmaking system to make a virtual human connection
- Swipe up and down for hook-up and dating
- Icebreaker games like “Would you rather?” and “Photo Challenge”
- See the people who swiped down on your profile (VIP version)
- A chance to match ten times more (VIP version)
- View people outside your local area (VIP version)
- An option to hide your dating profile from your Facebook friends (VIP version)
- See who liked your profile first (VIP version)
What people think of Feeld:
Hunter Breeden - Google Play
Only complaint is the lack of free privileges offered without upgrading. No sending messages or viewing profiles. All your able to do is see 10 profile. Cast a vote and then your done. Not even the price for service makes you want to pay for the upgrade
OkCupid
OkCupid is renowned as one of the best dating sites for open relationships due to its inclusive features that cater to diverse relationship styles, including polyamory. The platform allows users to specify their non-monogamy status, facilitating easier connections among those seeking similar dynamics.
Dr. Anapol highlights the significance of platforms like OkCupid in promoting honest and open relationships. She states, "Polyamory requires a high level of emotional literacy and the ability to communicate well, set and respect boundaries, and keep agreements." This perspective underscores the importance of platforms that support clear and open communication among individuals exploring non-traditional relationship structures
OkCupid comes with free, basic, and premium versions. The basic plan costs $4.95, while the premium plan costs $24.90. The features of the basic plan include being able to send unlimited likes, remove ads, and add extra preferences to your profile.
If you want to upgrade to premium, you can enjoy the added ability to send 3 SuperLikes weekly, see who liked your profile, and view answers of other users to questions you didn’t answer.
OkCupid has plenty of other features that we discuss in depth in our OkCupid review.
Features:
- Choose from monogamous and polyamorous individuals
- Link your partner’s profile to yours
- Offers 22 sexual orientations and 13 gender identities
What people think of OkCupid:
Capital-Election-956 - Reddit
I've tried a bunch of things, but all of my meaningful interactions come from either OKC or Tinder. The transparent about who you are and what you're looking for in your bio, and you'll find your people eventually.
Ashley Madison
In a world where ethical non-monogamy is gaining traction, Ashley Madison stands out as one of the best dating sites for open relationships, offering a discreet platform for those seeking to explore relationships beyond traditional norms. With a focus on privacy and confidentiality, Ashley Madison provides a space where users can connect with like-minded individuals interested in consensual non-monogamy.
Megan Wallace emphasizes the importance of honesty and openness in alternative relationship styles, a principle that aligns with Ashley Madison's commitment to discretion. As Wallace highlights, "There are many ways in which alternative relationship styles can be explored consensually and without a betrayal of trust," echoing the values upheld by Ashley Madison. Whether you're seeking casual encounters or meaningful connections, Ashley Madison offers a safe and confidential environment to explore your desires beyond monogamy.
The paid versions of Ashley Madison are as follows:
- Basic: 100 credits for $59
- Classic: 500 credits for $169
- Elite: 1000 credits for $289
For more details, you can also have a look at our Ashley Madison review where we talk more about what the app has to offer.
Features:
- Discreet from the billing all the way to payment methods
- Anonymous profiles are possible
- A guarantee package offers you a refund when it did not work out for three months
What people think of Ashley Madison:
Autumn Saeve - LinkedIn
Ashley Madison is not likely the best site to find people who are polyamorous. If you’re going to use a dating site/app, you’re probably better off with one like OKCupid where you can actually filter your results and mostly get matched with like-minded people.
The fact that they are permissive of polyamorous people doesn’t make it any more attractive to me. I think it is just their way of saying, “Hey, poly peeps, we think you’re the same as our clients that are looking for affairs, so join us!” I have a problem with a site that includes polyamorous people with people looking for discrete affairs because I don’t consider that ethical.
MoreThanOne
MoreThanOne is one of the free polyamory dating apps in this guide. While there’s a paid subscription of $9.99, you can pretty much enjoy all the features with the free version.
This dating app is designed explicitly for polyamorous individuals looking for hookups. Yes, it’s an exclusive app for people who like to unleash their wild side and release tension. To maintain the users’ anonymity, you can control the people who see your profile.
Also, MorethanOne is not a swiping app. It gives users a chance to create more detailed profiles so that they can see more information about someone before hooking up. It makes looking for a match so much easier!
Making a private profile is also possible. You can allow your profile only to be seen by potential connections you contact. This adds to the app’s privacy and discretion. MoreThanOne also provides a safe space for the LGTBQ+ community.
Features:
- Ability to link your profiles with your partner
- Sign-up is not required
- No need to link your social media account to your profile
- Supports private profiles for guaranteed security
What people think of MoreThanOne:
Trapgawdbravo - Reddit
Me and my wife really enjoyed the app even with the limited participants. I thought the range of what you were looking for coupled with the options for different sexualities was a good touch.
I struggled adding pictures at first but after I signed out and back in, it worked for me. If possible, I would suggest the ability to add short videos (like 3-5 sec) sort of like ig boomerangs.
I'm looking forward to seeing the app grow and spreading awareness of it on the poly groups I'm in.
What is Poly Dating to its Core?
Poly dating is when someone prefers to have a romantic relationship with more than one person at a time. Polyamory comes from the Greek words for ‘many’ and ‘love.’ In other words, it means having full romantic relationships with many people at once.
Just don’t confuse this with an open relationship. An open relationship is non-monogamous but only involves pleasure and sex. On the other hand, poly dating involves the entire disclosure of romantic feelings with no secrecy.
Moreover, you should also not confuse polyamory with polygamy. There’s a difference between these two terms, wherein polygamy involves marrying more than one person. In poly dating, marriage doesn’t have to be involved.
Polyamory offers various relationship structures, each with unique dynamics. Here's a deeper look at some common types, featuring insights directly from experts:
- Vee: Stephanie Sullivan, a licensed marriage and family therapist, describes a vee relationship as involving "one person dating two different people, who aren't dating each other." She notes that this requires "excellent time management skills and a lot of respect for the value of everyone else's time" to avoid conflicts.
- Triad: A triad is when three people are all romantically involved with each other. "Triads can form when the metamours in a vee decide they want to start dating as well," which introduces new dynamics and requires clear communication to manage everyone's needs effectively.
- Quad: Quads involve four individuals romantically connected, whether they come from two couples joining or a triad adding another partner. Relationship writer Rachel Pace says that like in smaller group configurations, the success of quads hinges on the "ability of all partners to communicate their preferences and abide by agreed rules" to prevent conflicts and ensure harmony.
- Parallel Polyamory: This type involves individuals who have multiple relationships that operate independently, with limited interaction between partners. It's characterized by maintaining "distinct boundaries to prevent overlap" between relationships, allowing for a simpler management of multiple connections.
- Kitchen Table Polyamory: Described as a setup where "all partners are comfortable with and often enjoy spending time together," this type fosters a sense of community among all involved. It requires openness and a shared willingness to build a close-knit network.
Beyond these set-ups, you can also find polyamorous people who don’t like these structures and simply engage in multiple romantic relationships. These people love going with the flow, regardless of whether they’re meeting new people online or offline.
Like monogamous relationships, playing the field of poly dating also has established rules both parties understand and follow. These rules help define the boundaries within the relationship, avoiding miscommunications that can negatively affect the structure.
The Pros
Poly dating also has its fair share of pros and cons, much like a monogamous relationship. For starters, honesty always prevails. People in polyamorous relationships are fully transparent with their desires and feelings, especially sexually and emotionally. This significantly decreases the risks of breaking up.
Poly dating also promotes proactive problem-solving because discussions about the relationship are more common. One person can automatically tell the other when he feels bored or stale in the relationship.
And finally, poly dating ensures boundaries and rules are well-defined. Guidelines should be clear to ensure there are equal exchanges of love and care within the relationship.
The Cons
Let’s talk about the downsides. Knowing these disadvantages can help you establish better rules so you know how to avoid ruining the relationship.
As the polyamorous relationship deepens, jealousy is inevitable. Someone might fall deeper in love with another, which can result in the person using it as a way to break up with their partner. Or worse, the person decides to return to being monogamous to focus on that single partner.
Introducing a new person to your relationship may stop you from unleashing your creativity and releasing more energy into your sex life. You might find it too time-consuming to look for new fantasy desires and techniques to try with your partner.
And finally, don’t think that poly dating can be the fix you need in your monogamous relationship. Some people switch to poly dating to spice up their sex life, which can lead to more issues. Yes, poly dating can get pretty exciting, but it won’t solve anything when you don’t talk about what really bothers you with your partner.
How Rare is Polyamory?
In general, a study revealed that at least one in six Americans are open to trying poly dating. Beyond that, one in nine people had experienced being in a polyamorous relationship. There are studies that say that the number of Americans who prefer being polyamorous is almost the same as those who wish to move to a different country.
Moreover, past research revealed that the number of polyamorous individuals is roughly the same as that of degree holders in the US. If you’re looking for other demographic details, young adults and people who are not straight are more interested in engaging in poly dating.
Despite the rising popularity, there’s still a looming dark shadow you must be aware of when engaging in poly dating. For instance, courts can use this against you when deciding on child custody proceedings. So, while polyamory can be great for some people, it can also have its disadvantages.
Ultimately, deciding to engage in poly dating depends on you alone. You must always know the pros and cons and become fully aware of what you’re dealing with.
Some Tips for Using Poly Dating Sites
If you’re a newbie in the poly dating world, there’s nothing to fear. Yes, it can feel scary and challenging at first. But as long as you know the rules and what you want, you should be good!
And we’re also here to help! With hundreds of polyamorous dating sites available, how can you be on your best behavior? Here are valuable tips to make your lives easier.
Tip #1: Don’t overdo it.
The most important tip is to never overdo it. Create your profile as you are. People on dating sites must know you for your real identity to ensure your interests and preferences match. Most of the time, overdoing it can lead to miscommunication which can lead to a major relationship failure!
Tip #2: Always be honest about being poly.
Polyamory dating sites exist because individuals who love dating more than one person are all about honesty and transparency. If poly dating is definitely what you’re looking for, you must always include it as part of your profile.
Plus, if you’re not honest about it, you might end up hanging out with a monogamous individual. And this can do more harm than good! When you’re open about being poly, chances are you’ll meet someone with the same interests as you and instantly click.
Tip #3: State your intentions clearly.
What are you looking for in the dating app? Are you looking for something long-term? Or are hookups and casual dating more your thing? Be specific about what you want and mention them explicitly on your profile.
Stating your intentions clearly allows the app to look for individuals matching your interests. This speeds up connections and saves time communicating with people who will not be what you want.
Tip #4: Consent, consent, consent
Respect begets respect. Before proceeding with meetups or conversations, always ask! Consent is critical, especially in polyamorous dating. This prevents any misunderstanding or harassment that can lead to more problems.
If you’re currently in a relationship, always ask your partner first before engaging with another person on a dating app. Even in an open relationship, your partner should know everything you do on the app, including the people you match with. Or else, it probably counts as cheating.
Tip #5: Don’t take rejection personally.
One last piece of advice: never take rejection personally. If the person you’re talking to realizes you’re not a match, so be it. Chances are you’ll find another one better that will suit your preferences.
Moreover, there are several dating apps you can try. This means you have more opportunities to meet other people who will accept you for who you are and the rules you establish.
Get Started on the Road to Polyamorous Dating
Polyamorous dating can be rewarding and fun. However, getting started means finding an excellent online platform for meeting people who are interested in the same lifestyle as you are.
Although you can use regular dating apps to find polyamorous relationships, your best bet is to turn to sites specifically designed for polyamorous couples. That way, you’re more likely to connect with people who are interested in the same lifestyle as you.
A couple of the best sites to use include Feeld, #Open, and Down, although there are others out there for you. Whichever you pick, it’s time to start on the road to love and get ready for a new romantic adventure.
FAQ about the Best Polyamory Dating Sites for Finding Open Relationships
What are the best dating sites for those in open relationships or practicing polyamory?
There are several options catering to the polyamorous community. Some popular choices include Adult FriendFinder, Polyamory Date, and OpenMinded. However, among them, Adult FriendFinder stands out for its large user base and extensive features designed to facilitate connections within the polyamorous community.
Are there any free polyamory dating apps or sites available?
Yes, there are free options available for those interested in polyamory dating. While many platforms offer free basic memberships, Adult FriendFinder provides a robust free option with features like browsing profiles, sending messages, and joining chat rooms without any subscription fees.
Why is Adult FriendFinder considered the best option for polyamory dating?
Adult FriendFinder earns its reputation as the top choice for polyamorous individuals due to its inclusive atmosphere and advanced features tailored to the needs of the polyamory community. With its vast user base, diverse membership, and emphasis on open-mindedness, Adult FriendFinder offers a welcoming environment for those seeking polyamorous connections.
How do polyamory dating sites differ from mainstream dating platforms?
Polyamory dating sites like Adult FriendFinder focus specifically on catering to individuals interested in ethical non-monogamy. Unlike mainstream dating platforms, these sites prioritize transparency, communication, and acceptance of diverse relationship structures, making it easier for polyamorous individuals to find like-minded partners.
Can I find meaningful connections on polyamory dating sites?
Absolutely. Many individuals have found fulfilling relationships, whether romantic or platonic, through polyamory dating sites like Adult FriendFinder. These platforms provide a supportive space for exploring one's desires and connecting with others who share similar values and relationship preferences.
References:
#Open (2022) Polysecure: Attachment, trauma & non-monogamy. Hashtag Open.
Anapol, D. (2013) The truth about polyamory. Psychology Today.
Clarke, J. (2024) What counts as cheating in a relationship in 2024? Heart Insider.
Cooper, P. (2024) 2024 DOWN dating app review. Heart Insider.
Dodgson, L. (2019) There’s a dark side of polyamory that nobody talks about. Business Insider.
Elvin, J. (2024) Ashley Madison review. Heart Insider.
Gahran, A. (2024, April) The relationship escalator & solo polyamory [Audio podcast episode]. In D. Winston, Lindgren, J. & Matlack, E. (Producers). Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships. Apple Podcasts.
Madrazo, M. (2024) Polygamist vs polyamorous relationships: what’s the difference? Heart Insider.
Moors, A. (2021) Polyamory is more common than you think. Public Health Post.
Moors, A., Gesselman, A. & Garcia, J. (2021) Desire, familiarity, and engagement in polyamory: Results from a national sample of single adults in the United States. Frontiers in Psychology, 12-1.
Pace, R. (2023) 9 different types of polyamorous relationships. Marriage.com.
Radanovic, G. (2024) What does playing the field really mean in 2024? Heart Insider.
Senkus, T. (2024) Adult FriendFinder review 2024. Heart Insider.
Senkus, T. (2024) How to get your girlfriend to break up with you. Heart Insider.
Sheff, E. (2023) 3 ways that a couple can be polyamorous. Psychology Today.
Varina, R. (2022) Let’s discuss the difference between polygamy and polyamory, shall we? Cosmopolitan.
Wallace, M. (2021) What’s the difference between polyamory and cheating? Cosmopolitan.
Wright, A. (2024) 2024 OKCupid review. Heart Insider.
Zabiegalski, R. (2023) Vees, triads, quads: the different types of polyamorous relationship structures, explained. Glam.
When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. Here’s how it works.
