How to Flirt with Your Girlfriend Over Text

Flirting with his girlfriend over text to make her smile

It’s a huge mistake to think that it’s all done once you get the girl. Keeping her happy in the relationship is as important as attaining her or “picking her up.” Most breakups happen when the guy gets lazy, stops taking care of himself, and stops seducing his partner. And this applies to both attracting her in person and keeping her interested in you when you’re not together physically. You need to keep that spark alive, so we’re here to teach you how to flirt with your girlfriend over text.

I made this guide to show you how to flirt with your girlfriend over text even if you have no texting skills whatsoever. I will first show you why it’s important to flirt with your girl even after the relationship, then I will share with you 9 techniques that you can use to flirt with your girlfriend over text and make her glued to her phone waiting for your next text.

The Importance of Flirting with Your Girlfriend Over Text

All relationships have a slowdown where both sides lose that steamy desire they once had for each other. But this shouldn’t mean you must keep it that way. Frequently flirting with your girlfriend over text – and in real-time – is a great way to keep the fire and passion alive between you. There are so many benefits you can get from flirting with a girl. Some studies even show that flirting makes you less prone to stress and anxiety. There are more benefits that you and your girlfriend will get from flirting with each other, including:

Flirting makes her feel wanted...

They say men fantasize about women and women fantasize about men fantasizing about them. Women LOVE attention. They love the idea of being pursued by men they find sexy or desirable. You can be the world’s most caring partner, but unless you can trigger her innate need for being liked, she will get bored.

When you flirt with your girlfriend over text or in real life, you remind her of that spark she felt at the beginning of the relationship and the efforts you made to make her fall in love with you. It makes her feel wanted again and wakes her feminine side again which yearns for proper masculine energy to tickle it.

... which helps you keep her

Studies show that nearly 70% percent of divorces and breakups are initiated by women, not men. If you make a woman feel ignored and unloved, she will soon look outside the relationship for those feelings. Since the rise of social media, women are getting more and more free attention from guys everywhere. If your girlfriend is hot enough, then don’t be surprised if she’s already getting dozens of flirty messages from guys on Instagram, Facebook, and Snapchat – in addition to the attention she’ll get in bars, clubs, and the gym. Most of these guys are harmless but make no mistake that some guy somewhere is waiting for you to slip and ignore your girl so he can take her away from you.

Read: Feeling Like an Option in Your Relationship? Do This Instead

Flirting adds an element of newness to your relationship

Keeping their relationship exciting

In a study by Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky from the Department of Psychology at the University of California, two groups of students were asked to do several acts of kindness to their partners for ten consecutive weeks. These acts of kindness varied from making their partners a nice breakfast to doing the dishes, flirting with them, and more. The only difference between both groups was that the first was asked to repeat the same act of kindness every single week while the second had to do one new act of kindness each week.

The results?

Those who did a bunch of different acts of kindness were found to be happier and less bored in the relationship than those who had to repeat the same good deed week in and week out.

In other words, the study found that routines – no matter how kind they are – can kill relationships. By adding flirting to your love arsenal, you add an element of newness to your relationship which makes both of you want to spend even more time together.

Flirting makes you look dominant and bold

Women may complain when being teased, but deep down they like it so much. Teasing – which is a subtler form of flirting – gives women the impression that you have no problem making fun of them instead of putting them on pedestals, which makes them want you even more. This comes from a woman’s innate desire to feel secure and protected by a stronger man. And, if you show her you’re not afraid of her, even by teasing her, then you probably aren’t afraid of the whole world around you.

Read: How T Be Dominant With Women (And Why Women Like Dominant Men)

How to Flirt with Your Girlfriend Over Text

Flirting with your girlfriend over text is much easier than flirting with a random girl you just met and want to impress. Why? Because you already know so much about her which gives you enough flirting material to use. Second, because you can go as bold and sexual as you can without walking on eggshells, and, finally, even if you're not that good at flirting over text, your girlfriend might cut you some slack and appreciate the effort.

So, exactly how do you flirt with your girlfriend over text and make her want you even more?

Here’s how:

Text her when she’s sitting next to you

I use this all the time and it always gets a laugh out of women. Just the fact that you chose text over speaking directly to her will remind her of those old days when you used to text miles apart. You can normally use this type of text to flirt, tease or initiate sex with her. Women love good surprises, so even if your line isn’t that good, the fact that you did something surprising and new will make a good impression on her.

For example, if you’re watching a movie together and you want her to follow you to the bedroom, rather than say it out loud and risk a “no” you can say something like:

“The butt on her (an actress) reminds me of someone + wink”

Or, talk to her as if she’s your mistress. This type of mystery arouses women. You can say: “Come over for some fun… My girl is busy with a boring movie”

Compliment her features in a dorky way

Nothing makes a woman feel wanted in a relationship than getting a compliment about her looks. Women are addicted to attention, and if you show specific – and wild – attention to her, she will feel attracted to you.

For instance, you can say:

“Forty minutes at work and I miss those titties already. We should thank your mama for them.”

Read: How to Compliment a Girl's Eyes: How To Do It Smoothly

Keep a flirty mindset all the time

To be good at flirting with your girlfriend over text – or in the physical world – you must have the desire to do so. Understand the importance of flirting in a relationship and always be looking for new things to say or text. Learn to sexualize everything you see and words will come naturally to you and you’ll find so many flirty things to say.

For example, if you see a photo like this somewhere:

Bread butt

Send it to her right away with something like,

“Reminds you of someone?”

You will make her laugh AND she will feel good about herself for having a hunch that you like.

Use images, emojis, GIFs, and even songs to spice things up

Don’t just use flat words to flirt with your girlfriend over text. Add emojis and gifs to spice things up. If you feel like taking her to the bedroom, send her a funny but flirty meme.

Even if you’re having a normal conversation over text, try to spice things up with memes and other fun things that will make her always look forward to texting you. You can also use a song that either reminds you of how hot she is or of something she did. If she compliments you on something you did, get a bit cocky and send her Taylor Swift’s opening verse of ME (I promise that you never find another like me).

Start with a question

Instead of throwing your line at her right away, spark her curiosity with a question. For example,

You: What did Mr. Olympia say to the protein shake?

Her: What?

You: I want you so bad

This is more likely to make an impact than if you just tell her “I want you so bad.” Both are good, but women like this one better.

Copy other people

“Good artists copy, great artists, steal” – Pablo Picasso

Don’t try to reinvent the wheel. If flirting doesn’t come naturally to you, then copy what other people do. The internet is full of funny memes and witty pickup lines. Use those lines to flirt with your girlfriend over text and don’t worry about sounding unoriginal. There’s a very slim chance she has heard it all.

And, if you don’t know where to start. Check the following guides and use the lines in them.

Tell her what you want to do with her

Whispering flirtatiously

If you want to learn how to flirt with your girlfriend over text, then one of the best – and wildest – flirting techniques you can use is drawing a full picture of all the naughty things you want to do to her. Use selective words and knowledge of your girlfriend to describe every single thing you want to do to her in bed. Tell her what she’ll hear, see and feel when you get back home and meet her.

Make her feel lustful and wanted so bad she gets addicted to those naughty texts from you. Women have wild fantasies that they keep to themselves.

Don’t believe me?

Then read My Secret Garden: Women's Sexual Fantasies by Nancy Friday, or just ask yourself why Fifty Shades of Grey is so popular among women. She doesn’t just want you to hit it hard in bed, she wants the full mental picture.

Keep it manly

I’m all in for being romantic and classy when flirting with a woman, but being a helpless romantic will give your woman the impression that you’re needy and can’t live without her which is a BIG turn-off to her.

It’s okay to send her a love note or buy her flowers from time to time but overdoing it will backfire.

So, what to do?

Be bold with your language as you flirt with your girlfriend over text, and try to throw in some humor or a good tease to balance the romance and show her that you’re still the man.

If you don’t know how to make a woman laugh over text, here’s a guide for it:

Give her names

Call her something resembling, funny, or even slutty that only you two know about. This can be fun and make her feel special. Personally, I prefer choosing one of her features and finding a proper nickname for her based on that. But, in case you have nothing in mind, here’s a list of 65 nicknames to choose from.


The key to flirting with your girlfriend over text is the intent--you want to show her that even if you already "got the girl", you want to keep her. This is perfect if her love language is words of affirmation because it allows you to express just how much you want to be with her. But even if this isn't her love language, texting her in a flirty way will still make her feel wanted and attractive. So give some of these tips and try and see how responsive she is!

When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. Here’s how it works.

Join Our Newsletter

Leave a Comment