My Review of Date You and How I Did Finding Real Dates With It

DateYou.com claims to be an innovative dating website where singles all over the world can find a partner, whether they’re looking for a long-term relationship or a short-term hook-up. But a lot of non-mainstream online dating services make these claims, only to turn out to be digital wastelands once you pay for a membership.

DateYou charges its users per message sent, meaning its users could end up wasting a lot of money before finding out whether the website is any good. That’s why I was so keen to put it through our intense review process. Here’s a preview of what I found:

Site Our Experience Our Rating Free Trial Link
Best for hookups
Experience Highlights
Experience Highlights
  • Best results for regular guys
  • Over 60 million active members
  • Our top hookup site for the year
  • Not good for long-term relationships
9
Try AFF For Free
Experience Highlights Experience Highlights
  • You pay for every message you send
  • Women don't want to exchange contact info
  • Designed to keep you on the site for as long as possible
1
Try DateYou

Dating apps have become a popular tool for single men to meet single women. Around 30% of the U.S population has tried using them, according to Pew Research, and a recent Stanford University study found it’s now more common to meet partners online than through friends.  

“Every day you get additional suggestions of people you could be compatible with,” says Amy Orlando, a writer for marriage.com. “Online dating is a great way to find your soulmate.” 

In spite of this, they remain a common source of frustation for a lot of men. Indeed, Pew Research daa reveals that 57% of men who use dating apps complain about not receiving enough messages.  

As such, it’s only natural for them to want to try one of the many alternative online dating services out there. The problem is that so many of these alternative websites are useless. Many of them are scams.

That’s where HeartInsider comes in. We make an effort to create the most comprehensive online dating website reviews so that you don’t waste your money on dating services that are no good for you.

I’m an online dating expert who has reviewed dozens of dating apps for Heart Insider. I know what makes a great dating app and how to spot the duds, and I reached a clear verdict during my time testing DateYou. Read on to discover whether it’s worth your money.

How we reviewed DateYou
At HeartInsider, we have crafted a standardized test for our online dating website reviews. We regard this to be the most intense testing process out there, so you can have full confidence in our verdicts.

In these tests, we always use the same photos, bio, demographical information and opening lines. This allows us to make fair comparisons to all the other online dating services we’ve previously compared.

After signing up for a DateYou account, I left my profile blank with no photos or bio for 24 hours. This is a reliable test to see if the website uses bots to send messages, as no real-life human woman would message a blank account.

After this test, I paid for enough credits to be able to message 50 women and try to lead the conversation towards swapping contact details, with the intention of organizing a date. This DateYou review is mostly based on how successful I was at doing this, compared to doing so with the same profile on other online dating websites. After all, we know this is what men care about more than anything else.

I made notes of how many women responded and how many were willing to swap contact details, and you’ll find the results of this experiment below. This will help you make an informed decision about whether DateYou is a good online dating service for your specific needs.

Now that you can see all the work I put into this let’s get to the results:

The Full DateYou Review and My Results

The site upon logging in

We have to be honest: most DateYou.com reviews only cover the basics. They barely ever get into all the little details that constitute a complete and thorough review. So we tried the Date You app and site to ensure we give you a full picture of what the site is all about.

Let’s begin this review with a basic summary, especially for those who aren’t interested in all the complex ins and outs of this service. Below, I’ve rated DateYou.com out of 10 for all the aspects we know are the most important for men. As a useful reference point, I’ve compared these ratings to AFF, which we rate as the number one hook-up app on the internet.

DateYou logo AFF
Overall

Our team rates each site objectively based on many hours of independent research, the features each site offers, and how it compares with other sites. The ratings are the opinion of our editors and their extensive experience.

1 9.5
Quality of Women

Our opinion of how attractive the typical woman is that uses this site and how easy they are to connect with compared to other sites.

1 9
Popularity

How many people are using this site to actually meet people compared to other sites.

1 9
Usability

How easy is this site to use and how quickly can an average person begin meeting people compared to other sites.

5 10
Privacy & Safety

Does this site take proper precautions to safeguard its members, their identity, and their data.

10 10
Effectiveness

Our opinion of how easily an average person will be able to achieve their dating goals with this site compared to other sites.

1 9
Value

Will the time and money spent using this site pay off for an average person based on the opinions and experience of our editors.

1 10
Our Recommendation

After logging into DateYou, it became immediately clear that the website was designed similarly to several other scam websites that I’d previously reviewed. Most likely, these websites are all owned by the same company and copied onto different URLs with a few subtle aesthetic changes.

Unlike some of these twin websites, DateYou didn’t flood my blank profile with messages from bots. In fact, my profile received 0 messages while it had no photo or bio. Seems like a good sign, right? Not really.

However, once I purchased credits and began messaging some of the female accounts, it quickly became apparent that DateYou would be just as useless as these other scam dating services.

Here are the key moments of my DateYou testing experience that you need to know about.

DateYou users have to pay for every message they send

The DateYou app’s business model involves users buying credits – and they’re incredibly expensive considering it costs 50 credits for each message you send to another user. The cheapest deal available is 1,100 credits for 24.99 Euros. That’s more than one Euro per message sent.

I recommend you don’t buy any credits, and you’ll see why when you read what happened to mine.

Every account replied to me almost instantly with cryptic messages

Other DateYou.com reviews would see this as a plus, but I definitely didn’t!

I messaged 50 women based in our fictional character’s home city of Columbus, Ohio. Every account messaged me back within a couple of minutes. The replies were always reasonably long, but written very cryptically in a manner I wouldn’t expect from a real person. You can judge the authenticity of these messages yourself.

Cryptic messages from users

Every account would make excuses when I tried to exchange phone numbers

Other Date You review fail to mention this, but it’s extremely important.

As with all of our online dating website tests, I tried to lead the conversation towards exchanging contact details as quickly as possible. This would be a natural step to take in any online dating environment to lead towards meeting up once it was clear both parties were attracted to each other. However, this would be a particularly obvious step on an online dating website that charges you per message.

Still, every time I suggested swapping phone numbers or social media details, the women would make a convenient excuse or avoid the question completely. This would happen even after they suggested they loved the idea of getting together.

There’s not enough evidence for me to suggest that the sole purpose of these accounts is to tempt men to spend more money on credits, so I’ll let you make your own judgment.

Responses after asking for their numbers

The bottom line of this Date You review: AFF is a better option (try it free here)

My experience using the DateYou app and website was extremely frustrating and resulted in zero new connections. I imagine I could have spent double or triple the money and still had nothing to show for it.

I can’t see any reason why someone would spend their money on DateYou, especially when there is a great option like AFF just a couple of clicks away.

Just under half of women are open to or have engaged in short-term sexual encounters, according to a study on hook-up culture published in the National Library of Medicine. Once you become an AFF member, you’ll realize just how many women are into that. 

We have rated AFF as the number one website for arranging casual hookups after testing it in various parts of the world. AFF launched in the early 2000s and has built up a phenomenal user base over the years. It makes no qualms about being a hookup site, and that means its users are rarely shy about admitting that’s what they want to do. The result is: you can often meet up with amazing, hot women within a few messages back and forth.

We’ve had amazing conversations and real-life experiences with AFF users all over the world, and you’re not charged per message either.

The difference between AFF is night and day. In fact, you can see it for yourself right now because the website is currently running a free trial.

To give you a more detailed look at how AFF works and how it performs for regular guys, you can also have a look at our Adult FriendFinder review.

Positives and Negatives We Found in Our Date You Review

To summarize, here’s what we liked and didn’t like about DateYou. This is what other Date You reviews fail to cover.

Positives
Negatives
  • The website is easy to navigate
  • There is no shortage of sexy profiles to browse
  • You have to pay for every message you send
  • The messages you receive rarely look like they're written by real humans
  • Every account replied to me, but they always made excuses to not share contact details
  • I spent a lot of money and got zero new leads out of it

Profiles, Pictures and Members on the Date You App

DateYou has a seemingly endless supply of profiles. You couldn’t message all the profiles in any large city if you tried. Most of the profiles I browsed were of very attractive women. However, most of the profiles I checked only had one photo and no bio. So I’ve found that my Date You review is basically centered around profiles that look extremely suspicious.

This is what you’d expect if the profiles weren’t created by the women themselves.

Skip Date You – These Are The App Dating Coaches Recommend For Normal Guys

Most guys fails because they spend all their time on an app that is never going to work for them. There are so many options out there and it’s really easy to pick the wrong one. Do yourself a favor if you’re a regular guy and try one of these apps that dating coaches recommend for you if you want real results:

SiteOur ExperienceOur RatingFree Trial Link
Best For Relationships
Experience Highlights
Experience Highlights
  • Easily the best option for long-term relationships
  • 75% of all online marriages start here
  • 70% of users meet their spouse within a year
  • In-depth signup and matching process
9
Try eHarmony
Best For Casual Fun
Experience Highlights
Experience Highlights
  • The best way to meet women for casual relationships
  • Best results for regular guys
  • Over 60 million active members
  • Not good for long-term relationships
9
Try AFF For Free
Great If You're Handsome
Tinder Highlights
Tinder Highlights
  • Great if you're pretty good looking
  • Very popular, especially if you're 18-22
  • Really focused on photos
  • Becoming more of a dating than hookup app
8
Try Tinder

A Design that Other Date You Reviews Don’t Talk About

Site design

The website and the DateYou app are easy to navigate. You’ll see plenty of suitable profiles to message on the main dashboard. New messages pop up in a new tab on the desktop website automatically, and you can see all your notifications in the sidebar. You can also click the inbox button in the main navigation for an easier overview of your messages. The profiles are easy to navigate too.

All in all, it looks like a thriving modern website, but looks can be deceiving.

Messaging and Chatting on the Date You App

Messaging and chatting

You’ll have to spend 50 credits for every message you send. New users begin with 100 credits, but that’s not going to be enough to establish a meaningful connection with anyone. That means you’ll need to pay to buy credits.

The design of the DateYou website makes it simple to send messages to other users. You can click on the tabs that pop up on the main dashboard, the notifications on the right sidebar, or a button on anyone’s profile to send a message. You’ll have 50 points deducted with every message you send until you don’t have enough left. Then you’ll be prompted to buy more credits.

Advertisements on the Date You App

I wasn’t bombarded with adverts for other products on the DateYou websites, other than a half-price offer on credits for new members. I wasn’t sent links to cam girl services or any other similar sexual services by DateYou members. So I guess that’s a plus that other DateYou.com reviews fail to mention.

Pricing Structures We Found During Our Date You Review

Site pricing

Just over a third of dating app users have paid for premium services, according to Pew Research, but I wouldn’t recommend spending a penny on DateYou. The cheapest deal available is 1,100 credits for 24.99 Euros. That’ll get you 22 messages in total. You can also choose to buy double or four times this amount, although there is no discount for buying more credits at a time.

What Other People Think About DateYou

Sadly, there are plenty of other DateYou users who have came to the same verdict as me. 

Toby Burns – Reviews.io

“Fake scam not real people and i would like a refund because this is not real.”

John – Sitejabber

“The site uses bots to keep you chatting. That’s why conversations seem to be nonsensical sometimes. Stay away from Dateyou and other fraudsters. You have to constantly purchase coins there and they cost an arm and a leg.” 

Rob Vincent – Reviews.io

“Complete scam and disgusting rip off! Women (and men who use pictures of hot women) get paid by the site. Don’t trust these scammers! I let them con me into this nasty site and lost money.”

How To Stay Safe Using Hookup Apps

The trap of paying to message fake profiles isn’t the only online dating scam  to watch out for. In 2022, some 70,000 Americans fell victim to online romance scams, where users act as interested lovers then trick their victims into sending them money. Around $1.3 billion was lost in the U.S alone to this ruse in 2022, according to the FTC.  

Scammers are opportunists. They always look for times, seasons, whatever is going on in the world at that particular time,” says Lorneth Peters, Better Business Bureau, director of marketing and communications.”

Research on romance scams suggests that women are most likely to be fooled, but around 40% of the victims are men nonetheless. Young, middle-aged and elderly dating app users have all been targeted. 

Follow these tips to ensure you fall victim to this horrible crime. 

  • Look out for verified profiles. Most mainstream dating apps allow users to complete a verification process to prove they are the person in their photos. If you feel suspicious about someone you’ve met on a dating app, ask them to verify their profile.
  • Do more research online. Adding your potential dates on social media can help you learn more about them, including whether they’ve been representing themselves accurately on the dating app. “We always suggest doing a reverse lookup tool and that is when you can lookup that individual’s picture that they have uploaded to the dating app and see if it’s used in other areas or other places on the web,” Peters added.
  • Look out for love-bombing. It’s a common tactic for romance scammers to overwhelm their victims with compliments and loving messages in the early stages of a conversation. “If you love pets, they love pets. If you’ve just been through a devastating loss, they’ve just been through a devastating loss,” says Rhonda Perkinsan, FTC attorney. “They’re really good at building those connections.”
  • Keep your head on your shoulders. Romance scam victims often get lost in their emotions after they begin communicating with a (often very attractive) fake profile. Love is all about emotions, but it’s important to keep a logical head so you spot bad apples and can make smarter decisions. “Many of these scammers are very skilled at reeling people in to earn their trust and take advantage,” says Arizona Attorney General Kris Mayes. “It’s just important to remember, if it seems too good to be true, it probably is,” 
  • Send deterrent messages. If you’re suspicious about a romance scammer, tell them exactly what you think they’re doing and how you’re going to respond. A study by Crimrxiv concluded that this is the best way to ensure scammers stop messaging you.  

Pew Research suggests 48% of people believe that it’s either somewhat or very safe to communicate and meet up with strangers from dating apps, but that’s not always the case. So, make a note of these tips and commit to following them at all times. 

What’s more, if you do find a website with real trustworthy people, it’s still worth taking precautions before you meet them for a date. “Tell friends when you’re meeting up with someone you met online, arrange your own transportation, and go to a public place,” advises tech writer Kristin Cooke. “And if someone you’ve just met online asks for money or wants to meet for the first time at your apartment, swipe left!”

DateYou.com Reviews: Frequently Asked Questions

Not sure what to make of DateYou just yet? Here are some quick FAQs to help you decide if this is still a site you want to check out.

What is DateYou?

DateYou is an online dating website and dating app, which claims to be able to help singles around the world effortlessly find a partner, whether that’s for a short-term hookup or something more serious.

How can I contact DateYou?

  • Click the three horizontal lines on the top-right-hand side of the screen.
  • Navigate to Help/Support.
  • Scroll all the way down to the bottom of the help page and click “Contact Form”

Who actually owns DateYou.com?

DateYou.com is owned by MP Mobile Performance Ltd, a company registered in Cyprus.

Is DateYou real?

You will get real responses whenever you message an account on DateYou. However, there is a lot of evidence to suggest that they are not from the woman in the pictures. Most of the bios are empty, most profiles have few pictures, most of the messages are very disjointed and cryptic. During my intense testing of this website, every single account dodged the question or made an excuse when I asked for contact details.

Is DateYou.com legit?

Pew Research suggests 42% of dating app users say that their dating life has become easier since adopting them, but I’d bet that drops to 0% for DateYou users. During my intense testing of DateYou.com, I found little evidence that there were legitimate single women sending me messages.

Is DateYou a scam or fake?

I don’t have any solid evidence that DateYou is a scam. At the same time, I have zero evidence that there is even one real woman using this website. You’ll have to make your own mind up from the screenshots in this review.

Is Date You safe?

There was nothing to suggest that my personal or financial data was going to be leaked or that my computer was at risk after signing up. I wasn’t sent any dodgy links or encouraged to sign up for anything else. My only concern is that some men might continue to spend a lot of money on DateYou without seeing any return on their investment, other than endless chatting with online accounts.

What are DateYou.com alternatives?

You can see our most highly-recommended alternatives to DateYou.com in our list of the best hook-up apps and websites we’ve tested.

How does DateYou work?

With DateYou, you’ll need to buy credits in order to send messages to other accounts. There are no limits on the number of women you can message or the number of messages you can send, although it will cost you 50 credits per message you send.

Is there a DateYou app?

There appears to be no DateYou app for iOS or Android. It’s desktop only.

How much does DateYou cost?

The cheapest deal available is 1,100 credits for 24.99 Euros. That’ll get you 22 messages in total.

How can you use DateYou for free?

New members are given 100 credits when they first sign up, meaning they can send two messages in total without spending any money. After that, they will need to buy more credits to send messages. It is possible to browse the website including all profiles, without sending messages, for free.

Can you send messages for free on DateYou?

You’ll be given 100 credits when you first sign up to DateYou. This will allow you to send two messages in total for free. You’ll have to buy credits to send more messages after that.

How do you cancel your DateYou account?

  • Click the three horizontal lines on the top-right-hand side of the screen.
  • Navigate to My Profile.
  • Click Delete Account.
  • Confirm you want to delete your account.
  • Click the link in the email sent to your associated email address.

This article may contain affiliate links, which means that if you click on one of the product links and make a purchase, we may receive a small commission. This commission comes at no additional cost to you.


References:

Anderson, M., Vogels, E. A., Turner, E. (2020). The Virtues and Downsides of Online Dating. Pew Research Center.

Cooke, K. (2019) Safest and most dangerous states for online dating in 2019. High Speed Internet.

Fletcher, E. (2024). Romance scammers’ favorite lies exposed. Federal Trade Commission.

Garcia, J. R., Reiber, C., Massey, S. G., & Merriwether, A. M. (2012). Sexual Hookup Culture: A Review. Review of general psychology : journal of Division 1, of the American Psychological Association, 16(2), 161–176. 

Healey, J. (2021) Christmas season is also catfishing season. Los Angeles Times.

Katr News (2024) Arizona AG Mayes warns about digital romance scams around Valentine’s Day.

Latimer, J. (2024) Tips to avoid romance scams ahead of Valentine’s Day. WSMV4

McClain, C. & Gelles-Watnick, R. (2024) From looking for love to swiping the field: Online dating in the U.S. Pew Research Center.

Nyam, I. H. (2020) Tackling online dating scams and fraud. The International Journal of Humanities & Social Studies. 

Office of the Attorney General (2024) On Valentine’s Day, Attorney General Bonta warns Californians against romance scams. State of California Department of Justice.

Orlando, A. (2024) 10 benefits of online dating. Marriage.com.

Rosenfeld, M. J., Thomas, R. J. & Hausen, S. (2019) Disintermediating your friends: How online dating in the United States displaces other ways of meeting. PNAS.

Senkus, T. (2024) 2024 eHarmony review: Will eHarmony find your perfect match? Heart Insider.

Senkus, T. (2024) Adult FriendFinder review 2024 – Is this app worth it? Heart Insider.

Vogels, E. & McClain, C. (2024) Key findings about online dating in the U.S.

Wang, C. (2022) Online dating scams victims psychological impact analysis. Journal of Education Humanities and Social Sciences.

Wang, F., Howell, C. J., Maimon, D. & Jacques, S. (2020) The restrictive deterrent effect of warning messages sent to active romance fraudsters: An experimental approach. CRIMRXIV.


Contributing Author:

Tom Senkus

For more than two decades, Tom has dated extensively and studied behavioral psychology as a way of understanding the complexities of human nature until he became an expert. After traveling as a touring musician and living in more than 15 countries, Tom has cross-referenced his experience in seduction, dating, and interpersonal dynamics with the ever-changing landscape of 21st-century dating. His work as a writer has appeared in 500+ publications (digital and print). Tom is also the author of several books (available on Amazon). In his free time, you can find Tom recording music and cooking the best Cincinnati-style chili you’ve ever had.

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