Finding the best cougar dating app for you can be quite a challenge these days but it's absolutely essential. It doesn't matter if you're a younger man looking for older women or an older woman that wants a younger guy the right app can make things a LOT easier for you. New apps pop up every day but very few are actually worth your time.
According to the latest census stats, there are approximately 43 million women in the United States that are between the ages of 35 - 55. In other words, there are plenty of cougars out there - and there’s no better way to meet them than by using cougar dating apps! But here are a few that have consistently worked when it comes to meeting older women:
Site Our Experience Our Rating Free Trial Link 
Experience Highlights Try AFF For Free 
Experience Highlights Try eHarmony 
Experience Highlights Try Passion
You also have to be careful because almost all of the cougar dating site reviews you see online were written by professional writers (not dating experts) who never even used the app, let alone a paid membership!
That's where we're different. Unlike the other reviews you find online, our team has extensively used more than 100 different apps in the past year, including buying the paid memberships. If you’re looking for the best options online for younger men to meet older women we’ve got you covered.
It's more important than ever to find the right app for you with all the social distancing still happening. A HUGE number of older women (and younger guys) are only meet each other online now. If you're not doing the same there are a lot of opportunities you're going to miss.
How We Review Cougar Dating Apps and Sites and Why It Matters
Taking the time and spending the money to do a complete review of a cougar dating site is hard work. That's why nobody else is doing it. It's also the only way to truly understand who will do well using a particular app or site.
We've wasted a LOT of time on many terrible dating apps over the years so you don't have to. We've also found some really great options using this process:
- We spend several weeks using both the free version of the cougar site and any paid version (most reviews only cover the free version)
- We send several dozen tailored messages to cougars of all kinds that have proven effective on many other sites
- We followed up consistently using proven techniques we teach that have led to hundreds of dates
- We set up as many dates as we can and actually meet up (we’re looking to meet cougars too after all)
- We then compare our experience with the 100+ other ccougar apps we have recently reviewed to see where that app or site ranks
That sounds like a LOT of work to do (and it is) but it’s really the only way to accurately measure which apps and sites are going to help regular guys meet a lot of single cougars.
Affiliate Disclaimer:
At HeartInsider, our core values are transparency and honesty. Some links within our articles are affiliate links, which means we may earn a modest commission at no extra cost to you, should you click through and make a purchase. Our affiliations do not sway our editorial content; we only endorse products or services we genuinely believe will benefit our readers. We regularly update our content to ensure the information stays accurate and reliable. Your trust is invaluable to us, and we are committed to maintaining a high level of clarity and integrity in all our endeavors.
Below we have our rankings of the 6 best cougar dating apps right now, how we rate them, and some of our best cougar dating tips:
#1 - AFF is the best cougar hookup site
If you want to know about Adult Friend Finder (AFF), you should know just how popular these apps are for the 35 - 55 age range for cougars.
One of AFF’s main competitors, the cougar-themed Cougar Life has a target audience for cougars and the men that love them. According the senior director of communications at Cougar Life, Isabella Mise, 15% of female users on their app aged 50 plus - meaning there are still plenty of women in the “cougar sweet spot” age range.
"They're still looking for connection, love, physical intimacy, and I think online dating is perhaps a way for them to widen their dating pool," Mise said.
Got that? There’s PLENTY of cougars out there!
AFF (which has a great free trial) is the cougar hookup app if you're just looking for fun in the bedroom without any commitments. There are a few other options out there (like Tinder) that are more hookup-focused but nothing compares to AFF in our experience, especially for guys that want to date women in their 30's, 40's and older.
AFF has been around for a while and is what a lot of cougars have been using for years. Most other apps are filled with younger women and cougars just don't want to compete with that. Instead, they've flocked here. There just isn't a better hookup option to meet women 35+ right now.
This is a site that is ALL about getting to the bedroom fast. If you want something where it's ok to skip the small talk, skip the dates, and just get down to business you've found it.
With over 60 million active users and a very engaged group of women this has been the best option for most guys that we've found. Check out AFF's free trial and see what we mean. If other apps haven't worked for you AFF will be a much better experience.
Why AFF is the site to hookup with older women
- With over 60 million members is the biggest site of its kind
- The hookup option that guys do the best with
- Women that actually want to meet up
What we don't like about it
- You have to signup through their website
- Design could use an upgrade
User Testimonial on Quora for AFF:
Sachin Dawhan - Quora
“The hook up site has existed for a very long time and it’s what everyone knows (especially women). And so they’ve got millions of users globally.
And for female profiles, you need that high volume of users as otherwise it will not work.
If you can use the site or app to your advantage, will obviously depend a lot on if you can stand out from the crowd and attract those female profiles.
But in my experience it’s really not that hard because most male users seem to have problems just being themselves. And this is number one thing females are looking for before they want to know if you are compatible sexually.”
#2 - eHarmony is the best cougar dating site for relationships
Before we delve into why eHarmony is the best cougar dating site, let’s give you a 15-second warmup on what it means to date a cougar in this day and age (courtesy of the experts at Brides.com):
|
Expert |
Credentials |
Quote |
|
Relationship Expert and Interim Vice Provost, California State University, San Bernardino |
"Marrying in your 40s, especially if it's for the first time, means you have fewer years till death do you part, so this really could be The One." |
|
|
Family Psychotherapist, Beverly Hills, California |
"Nothing turns off a new person more than hearing you rag about somebody else." |
|
|
Licensed Clinical Psychologist, Los Angeles, California |
"Most relationship mistakes happen because a person does not trust their instincts early on and sticks around thinking it will change." |
|
|
Online Dating Expert and Celebrity Matchmaker |
"Establish your deal breakers and don't compromise important values just to impress someone you like. Don't beat around the bush long-term—been there, done that." |
eHarmony might not be considered a pure cougar finding app but it turns out that it really excels in one particular area. If you want to meet a cougar for a long-term, committed relationship there isn't a better option. A crazy stat to illustrate this is that 75% of all marriages that began online started on eHarmony. 75%!
What makes this one of the best apps to find cougars is numbers and experience. There are a ton of cougars on this app and they have a unique matching system that actually works to pair you up with compatible women.
If you haven't heard of eHarmony, seen the commercials, or met a couple that used it you're definitely in the minority. This is one of the largest sites in the world and they spend a ton of money to attract new women to the site, especially women over 35.
They also have a very unique matching system that figures out what you want through a series of questions and sends you matches every day the fit your desires. That means cougars looking for guys like you are sent your way ever, single, day.
We've seen a lot of guys try it and those that really want a long-term relationship have had really good results. If that sounds like you check out their trial below and make it happen.
Why eHarmony is worth downloading
- By far the best success rates for long-term relationships with 70% of members meeting their future spouse within a year on the app
- The highest percentage of women 35+ from the super popular dating apps
- Really easy to use
What we don't like about it
- Set up process for your profile is pretty involved
- You have to follow their process exactly
- You have to signup through their website
User Testimonials for eHarmony on Quora:
Melinda Lofthaus - Quora
“It did for me and my now husband of 6 years (we met in our late 20s). Before eharmony I used all the dating apps for years and only met jerks who didn’t want a committed relationship, so I thought I’ll give eharmony a shot. My first date on eharmony is now my husband. They really did a great job matching our personalities and humour. Also the fact that people pay to be on there means most people are committed/ serious so much fewer jerks than on the swiping apps.”
If you don’t want to go through all the trouble of snooping through their socials or asking them more detailed questions, there’s a tool you can use to know for sure that the person you’re talking to is who they say they are. It’s Instant Checkmate, a background-checking tool that can help you know more about people you find online–the legal and hassle-free way. All you need are a few of their details and Instant Checkmate will give you all the information you need to verify who you’re really talking to online.
Try out Instant Checkmate’s free trial and see just how easy it is to get all the info you need. Better safe than sorry!
Safety & Precautions for Meeting Women for Sex Online
We mentioned it before, but it bears repeating:
Safety is paramount when it comes to online dating for cougars.
Online dating presents a modern-day scenario where love, fun, and connections are just a click away. However, it’s notwithout its set of risks.
And though the industry is progressively enhancing safety protocols with features like AI-enhanced profile verification, you’re ultimately responsible for ensuring a safe dating experience.
With a blend of caution and the right knowledge, you can significantly mitigate these risks. Below is a quick reference to ensuring your safety while seeking connections online:
Safeguarding Personal Information:
- Profile Privacy: Adopt a pseudonym for your profile to sustain a level of anonymity.
- Separate Email: Establish a new email address dedicated to your online dating endeavors, keeping them distinct from your regular online interactions.
Identifying Red Flags in Profiles:
- Profile Verification: Exercise caution with profiles lacking a bio, unlinked to social media accounts, or showcasing just a single picture as these might be red flags for fake accounts.
Diligent Verification of Your Match:
- Background Checks: If feasible, cross-verify your match's photos and conduct a background check.
- Social Media Verification: Explore your potential date's social media to affirm their identity.
Taking the Plunge When Ready:
- No Rush: Don't succumb to pressure of meeting up in person until you are entirely at ease with the idea.
Privacy Preservation:
- Information Sharing: Maintain a cautious stance on sharing personal information, ensuring you feel sufficiently comfortable with your match before divulging more.
Transitioning to Offline Meetings Safely:
- First Meeting Precautions: Adopt prudent measures when meeting offline for the first time, with extra vigilance for long-distance meetups.
If you want to share your own experiences with staying safe while hunting for your next cougar, leave a comment below. Heart Insider offers vast community of informed users and we pride ourselves on fostering better experiences when it comes to positive dating experiences.
HeartInsider.com Articles on Best-Practices for Online Dating Safety
Want to learn more about online dating safety. HeartInsider offers these popular articles for having a good time without a hassle:
- “Is Online Dating Safe?” - This article explores the risks associated with online dating and suggests that with proper precautions, online dating can be safe.
- “The Top 5 Safe Dating Apps Experts Recommend in 2024” - Provides insights into choosing a safe dating app by looking at the number of users, the app's safety features, and other important critera.
#3 - Passion is another great option for casual fun
Passion is still a decent option for younger guys looking for older women. In fact, it's really the only major league site out there with a pretty strong focus on cougars and the men who love them. With over 30 million members there are going to be cougars to choose from wherever you live.
If you haven't tried out their free trial (check out the links above and below) you need to. No other site out there is great for both cougar hookups as well as longer-term relationships. Every other site on our list is good for either one or the other.
The most important aspect of a dating app is being able to get a lot of people using it. Most of the other cougar sites are pretty small, with less than a million members (if that). This is the only option out there right now that has MILLIONS of members. Dating is a numbers game but the odds are in your favor here.
We've been recommending Passions's free trial for years and it continues to deliver for guys out there. Check out their free trial and see for yourself how easy it can be to meet cougars online.
Why Passion is a great cougar dating app
- Guys have consistently been having good success using it
- One of the largest cougar communities out there
- Good mix of cougar hookups and longter-term friends with benefits
What we don't like about it
- Has dropped off in popularity a bit
- Still not as big as some other sites out there
- You have to signup from their website
User Testimonials for Passion.com:
Ash Wright - Heart Insider
A final word on Passion.com
I think the last note I wrote in my research for this review really sums up my experience here:
“Not a bad site but if you’re going to use the AFF network go with the mothership.”
Having said that, in the interests of a fair and open review, there is one thing that might give you a better experience on the site. That is, essentially, a bit of networking.
Assuming the time stamps can be trusted, the site does seem to be active with real users. While I managed zero dates over the space of a month, there is a chance it’s because I’m a new user.
Some sites, especially those that are kink-targeted, tend to favor those that are very active. The common names you see in the comments, in the blog or discussion sections and that are open to lengthy conversations.
While I wouldn’t personally put months of my time into a site like this, maybe, just maybe, you’d have a better experience if you did.
How The Top 3 Cougar Dating Apps Compare Head-To-Head
| Site | Our Experience | Our Rating | Free Trial Link |
|---|---|---|---|
Best Hookup Site For Men | Experience Highlights
| 9 | Try AFF For Free |
Best For Relationships | Experience Highlights
| 9 | Try eHarmony |
2nd Best For Hookups | Experience Highlights
| 8 | Try Passion |
#4 - Tinder can work to meet cougars who want a younger man
Tinder is usually thought of as for younger women but it can also be a great app for older women dating younger men. It might not be as effective as some of the other options on our list but it can still work out pretty well.
Tinder works best if you're a decently attractive guy though. It's ALL about the photos so yours will need to be on point. If you aren't at least a 7, preferably an 8.5 plus, Tinder can be a pretty frustrating experience.
The reason it can be so rocky is that the top 10-15% of guys are usually getting all the attention from the top 70-80% of women. When so few guys get all that cougar attention it doesn't leave much for the rest of us.
The women on Tinder also tend to be among the flakiest of any app. There are a LOT of them that only go on Tinder for attention and validation, not to actually meet up.
Why Tinder is cougar dating friendly
- Huge number of users just about anywhere
- Great looking guys will get a lot of attention
- Cougars use it to meet younger guys
What we don't like about it
- A lot of older women avoid it completely
- Your photo is pretty much all that matters
- Lots of flakes
User Testimonials from Quora on Tinder:
Sarah - Quora
“I met my current and only boyfriend of the past 8 years, with just a genuine swipe right on the basic Tinder app with no added extras! It can work but the journey is often not the easiest for sure. And, I would rather I hadn’t wasted hours of my life on them. But, it did pay off and for that, I’m extremely grateful xxx”
#5 - Cougar Life is one of the better options out there
Cougar Life is one of the newest cougar dating apps out there and it's been growing in popularity pretty fast. It's still a lot smaller than the apps we've already covered but it's worth talking about. They have over 7 million users and have had some decent reviews.
It has a focus on ONLY cougars and guys who want to date them and even seems to use the same color schemes!
Given how many cougars prefer online access it isn't a surprise that Cougar Life is so popular.
While we think there is room for another great cougar dating app it's still too early to tell if this is the one. For now, it doesn't really have anything to offer that the apps before it on this list don't do better.
Why Cougar Life is worth trying
- Newest app on our list
- Growing quickly
- Good mix of singles
What we don't like about it
- A lot smaller than the other options
- Needs more time to grow before it moves up the list
User Testimonials from Trust Pilot:
docdemort - TrustPilot
“One good thing i can say is the peoples photos definitely seem to be real people as apposed to other sites who use fake models, and fake inbox messages. So the way this site operates, is it, tries to initiate a messaging situation, between you by sending you a message, about a girl and tries to get you to message her. Once that goes down, you have to buy credits in order to keep it going. ok so 500 credits 100$, actually i dont mind paying if this site can actually facilitate what it is purporting. so far im at 50/50 im still unsure if its real, although at this point i would guess that it is legitemate. the only way to know for sure is to invest. i will try, when i have the chance, and report back.”
#6 - Older Women Dating is all about older women and younger men
Older Women Dating has a name that makes it pretty obvious what they're about. This is the point in our review where the quality of the apps we have on the list takes a major dive. We would really only recommend that you check out the first four apps on our list. Let's dive a bit deeper into this site though.
This is a cougar site that has been around since 2004 and is still hanging in there somehow. If you look at their website (which doesn't look like it's been updated since 2004) you begin to get a clearer picture of what we're dealing with.
Instead of being more of a cougar dating site app, Older Women Dating has rebranded itself as being more of a "sugar momma" app. Unfortunately, it hasn't been very good for that either. It doesn't take long after using this app to realize that you're going to be wasting your time. Even looking at the cougar profiles on their download page we spotted several "members" that we know are just using cheap stock photos.
Why Older Women Dating is worth trying
- Can work if you just want a sugar momma
- The app is better than their website
What we don't like about it
- We’re not confident at all that this will work for most guys
- Their marketing really makes us question how legit it is
User Testimonials for OlderWomenDating.com:
Michael Stevens, Dating Coach - Heart Insider
“Overall, OlderWomenDating.com is not the worst out there
There are a lot of terrible sites out there that advertise as a place to meet anyone. Most of those sites are a complete waste of time and money. I outline the best in our annual review found here but Older Women Dating falls somewhere in the middle. It has an outdated design. It is frustrating to use. Most importantly though, there are simply far too many guys trying to a lady compared to the number of women on the site.
If you are serious about your desire you will be much better off pursuing one of the sites outlined in our annual review.”
Expert Advice on Dating Your Next Cougar
Dating a cougar, which refers to a mature woman interested in dating a younger man, can have its own unique set of advantages and challenges. Here are some insights and advice from dating experts regarding dating cougars or older women:
Honesty is Essential
According to David Wygant, an internationally-renowned dating and relationship coach, author and speaker. "Older women have an extremely sensitive bullshit detector, so be 100% honest all the time. They are more appreciative of open communication. If you want to have sex with her but don’t want to be her boyfriend, tell her. You’ll be pleasantly surprised by her response".
Be Open-Minded
Joshua Harrington, prolific author on dating and men’s health at Datingology.com, promotes an open-minded approach to dating older women. Harrington says, “You’ll most likely have different interests and tastes in everything, from movies and music to food and wine. However, this can be great if you are open-minded enough—don’t be afraid to try new things, develop your tastes, and embrace new concepts. That’s how you’ll bring out the energy in your partner and make your relationship more interesting for both of you.”
Don’t Call Her a “Cougar”
By all means, don’t call her a “cougar”. Harrington explains that “some women find this term offensive because it highlights the age difference between you, and that’s certainly not what they want to hear. After all, there are many ways to name your couple, so following this rule is quite simple.”
Be An Adult
Dating expert Mertcan Yalcin offers his advice for how men should act when dating older women. He says, “When you are in a relationship with a cougar woman, you need to act like an adult. You have to be able to set boundaries and stand your ground. She will test you, so it is important that you keep your cool and don’t sink to her level.” In other words, act mature to get a mature relationship.
Now that you’ve got a good idea of which apps are the best for finding a cougar in 2024, it’s time to take action. Try each app and see for yourself - you may be shocked to find just how many opportunities for older women are in your area today!
And because we believe in building a trusted community to navigate the complexities of modern dating, HeartInsider encourages you to drop a comment below if you’ve got some recommendations. From which apps worked best for you, the best approaches for picking up cougars in the wild, and more, we’re all ears!
Best of all, HeartInsider has a massive archive of up-to-date dating guides for cougars and just about any relationship type you’re into. Use the search bar to find what you’re looking for and be amazed at how BeyondAge’s actionable advice can change your love life today!
FAQs about Cougar Dating Apps and Sites
We spend a TON of time testing and reviewing all of the top cougar sites out there every year (over 100). We always get questions about what our process is like and how we determine the best. These are the frequently asked questions that we wanted to answer:
What are cougars?
A "cougar" refers to an older woman who is interested in dating younger men, typically with an age difference of around 10 years or more.
The dynamics in such relationships can be quite different from traditional ones, and often, they are characterized by a sense of adventure, openness to new experiences, and a level of maturity and confidence from the older partner that can be very appealing to younger men.
The popularity of the term has led to a niche in the dating market, with many dating apps and websites now catering specifically to older women interested in younger men and vice versa. These platforms provide an avenue for these individuals to connect, interact, and potentially form relationships in a supportive and open environment.
What is a cougar dating app?
Cougar dating apps are dating apps specifically designed for younger men to meet older women. Unlike more general dating apps, an age gap of over 10 years is typical and it makes it much easier for singles looking for that type of relationship to find it. On a cougar dating app, you should expect younger men to be looking for women more than ten years older than them and women 35+ looking for much younger men.
How do you choose the best cougar dating websites?
Every year we test out and review dozens and dozens of dating apps and sites. We typically follow the following plan with every cougar app we review:
- A complete profile is created including good photos
- We explore and use the free version of the app for a couple of weeks
- A paid membership is purchased
- We then spend weeks using the paid version to fully understand what the app has to offer
- Dozens and dozens of women are messaged and chatted with online by one of our dating experts
- We try to set up as many dates and meetups as possible
This process allows us to get a very good idea of the quality of each app. It takes a long time to complete but it's worth it.
What are the most important factors of a good app to meet cougars online?
There are a handful of key features that every cougar dating app needs in order to be a great place for singles:
- Large and active userbase of singles, usually multiple millions
- A well-designed app that is easy to use
- The ability to continually attract more new users to the site than leave
- Solid matching or search capabilities
- Clear goals and purpose for the site and how it helps singles
If a cougar app can check all five of these off their list there is a very good chance that it's a quality option. If it's missing even one then it likely isn't a good option for anyone.
Should you use a free cougar dating app?
Using a free cougar dating app and what the best free cougar dating apps are is a question that comes up a lot. The reality is that you get what you pay for when it comes to cougar apps. Free apps are filled with women that are just looking for attention. They aren't committed to actually meeting anyone and they use the app almost like a self-esteem-bosting video game.
If you're a particularly good-looking guy you can still get some results but the competition is often fierce. When everyone can use the app for free it's going to be full of guys blasting out 100 messages a day to every woman they find hoping to get lucky. Overall free cougar apps just tend to be bad experiences for both men and women.
What are the best free cougar dating sites?
As we mentioned before, there really isn't a good cougar dating site that's actually free. All of the quality options require a paid membership because you get what you pay for with these types of apps. Every free option has thousands of guys bombarding every woman with messages every day and the best looking guys get almost all of the female attention.
Paid sites tend to have much better male/female ratios, more engaged and interested women, and almost always provide far superior results for men.
Are these good apps to meet older women?
These are probably the best apps to meet older women out there right now. This goes for both younger and older guys. All of the apps and sites in our rankings have a large now single older women, are easy to use, and make meeting older women a LOT easier.
Outside of apps and sites, where are some of the best places to meet cougars?
According to dating expert Emily Brooks (a long-time writer at HeartInsider), the following are ten great places on where to meet older women:
- Coffee Shops
- Cooking Classes
- Yoga Classes
- Bookstores
- Grocery Stores
- Volunteer Events
- Bars and Clubs
- Adult Learning Classes
- Outdoor Activities or Sports Leagues
- High-End Shopping Centers
References:
Vartan, M. (2023). Tips for dating in your 40s. Brides.
Carmelia Ray. (n.d.). Home Page.
CSUSB. (n.d.). Kelly Campbell, Ph.D.
Wygant, D. (2023). Dating older women. Dating Advice.
Harrington, J. (n.d.). Dating a cougar. Datingology.
Dr. Fran Walfish. (n.d.). Home Page.
Dr. Ramani. (n.d.). Home Page.
Statista. (2022). Population of the U.S. by sex and age.
Yalcin, M. (2022). The 10 rules of cougar dating in 2022. Victoria Milan.
Contributing Authors:
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